Ever since I've started working at my new job, a friend of mine(girl) has been telling me to make a move on this girl who started around the same time as me. My friend told me that the rumour going around the office was that many people thought we liked each other/ were good together. I was just being nice cause we were working together, I mean I'm a nice guy so I was just being myself. Only problem here is I'm not interested in women but I'm not out to anyone. Now my friend has asked me before if I like this new girl, I just said she wasn't my type, and she asked.. Well what's your type? My heart stopped at that moment and I just said I'd rather not answer that, then she questioned why and I just told I hadn't really though about it(omg such a bad answer but I couldn't think of anything to say). So anyways, she texted me a few hours ago saying I should made a move on her(new girl at work). So turns out they went to the gym together after work and I guess I came up in the conversation and it turns out that she likes me :bang: So know I don't know how to respond. I'm not out to my friend or anyone at work, I'm not ready to come out and I don't know how to respond because any straight guy would date this girl because she quite attractive. I'm going to be staying at my friends place later in the week and I don't know how to respond if she asks me. And if you were wondering, the reason I don't want to come out to this friend at work is because she's my best friends GF and I'm not out to anybody not ready to come out. So I don't want to tell her then she tell him. This is just all gotten so confusing a webbed together I just don't know how to proceed. If any of you smart guys or gals have some wisdom to shine my way please do so. I greatly appreciate it.
It annoys me that people ask for justification with your feelings, haha. If you're dead-set on not coming out to anyone, the next time someone asks, you can just say that you've thought about it and you don't want to date someone at work. That whole phrase - "Don't shit where you eat." Relationships at work can lead to some ugly and uncomfortable situations, so just say that it's not something you want to get into.
TJs advice is spot on. Another option is to do what my straight brother does and just be coy, clever and totally unavailable. He stays so busy that no girls want to chase after him because there is no room left in his life for them. He has been doing this for years because he wants to travel and finish his MBA before getting hitched... There is always the "I am not really ready to meet anyone right now, I am going through a lot and its just not something I want to concentrate on right now. " Shows you are thoughtful and considerate and simply not at that point in your life (not that in your case, you will ever be.) If that doesn't work and they insist on setting you up, I am sure you could find plenty of ways to be the worst date ever. Find out what she likes and just be the opposite.. But, I find being at least partially truthful helps convince people more easily..
