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An idea - Coming out letter?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Martin, Aug 19, 2008.

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  1. Martin

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    Hey peeps,

    I have been think about coming out to my mum lately. On the 27th I need to go into college to sign up for my courses for my final year. I need to do this at 9am and will probably be there for an hour or so. I was thinkinf of possibly leaving a letter for my month explaning things and giving her time to think it through and possibly think of any questions to ask me when I get her home. The only problem is I have no idea what I would put in this letter. :confused:

    So yeah, any advice on what to cover in this letter is greatly appreciated. :grin: Whether I go ahead will depend how things are form now up until that morning, but this is going to happen whether I have to keep trying daily. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  2. Micah

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    Dear Mum,

    I've been wanting to tell you that I'm gay for a while now, but couldn't find the words to do it; so sorry for resorting to a letter. Know that I love you, and that this doesn't change who I am.

    If you have any questions about it I'll be more than happy to answer them when I come back.

    Love
    Martin
     
  3. beckyg

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    Micah, that was Adam's coming out e-mail almost to the letter. :roflmao: Except it was addressed to all of us. Martin, it turned out all right for us. :slight_smile: Go for it! (*hug*)
     
  4. Louise

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    I think short and simple is often best.

    Dear Mum,
    I have something to tell you which I am uncomfortable saying to your face to face hence this letter. After years/months of reflection I have realised that I am gay. This is not a phase, this is who I am, I love you and want you to be proud of me.
    I will be back in an hour or so and if you want to ask me questions I will do my best to help you come to terms with this just as I have had to.
    Love
    Martin

    Well something like that anyway. Add some personal touches and maybe get some resources so that she can read up on the subject, find support groups in your area (if there are any) tell her they exist but don't expect her to go rushing out to join one just yet, the news has to sink in a bit first.

    Good luck :kiss:

    PS I don't really blame you for my not being able to re initialize my computer :slight_smile:
     
  5. ctw0625

    ctw0625 Guest

    yeah, i like micah's suggestion as well. i recommend keeping the letter fairly short, simple, and to the point. let it prepare her, not necessarily go into all of the "who, what, when, where, why"s. those would be better coming from you, so that you can better explain yourself and answer any questions as you go. after leaving the letter, id go to sign up for your classes and then come straight home to talk about it. be honest, up-front, and fair to both yourself and her. sorry is my advice was really generic, but hopefully it was helpful.

    wishing you the best of luck,
    chris
     
  6. ctw0625

    ctw0625 Guest

    ok, i like louise's a lot too, she posted while i was on the page so i didnt see it at first.
     
  7. Mirko

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    Hey Martin! I like both Micah's and Louise's suggestions. Have some material ready for her as well.
    Good Luck!
     
  8. -Michael-

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    Just tell her how you feel.
    Why you feel that way.
    Answer the main questions (*are you sure*)
    and say nothings changed except she now knows one minor fact about you.
    That youll love her nomatter what :slight_smile:


    Good Luck.
     
  9. Martin

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    Okies, thanks peeps. :slight_smile:

    We'll see what happens in a week from now. :grin: :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:
     
  10. Don't forget the part about how you plan to turn everyone gay and rule the world one day. She'll love that part. Just kidddinggg....kinda. But yea like everyone said you don't have to write a book, just be straight (no pun intended) to the point.
     
  11. BitterEdge

    BitterEdge Guest


    OMG now that I'd pay someone to do...hahaha wow
     
  12. -Michael-

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    aha this would need to be recorded :')
     
  13. Martin

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    I'll be sure to print out the news article on gay bombs. :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

    Knowing my mum she would agree to test one on my dad just to annoy him. :eusa_danc
     
  14. -Michael-

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    ahaha

    good luck:smilewave:eusa_danc
     
  15. Paul_UK

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    I do like Louise's note. Short and to the point, but clearly worded.

    The detail can be discussed when you get back home, and over the following days and weeks.

    Good luck, and please let us know how it goes. (*hug*)
     
  16. GlindaRose

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    Good luck!! :slight_smile:
     
  17. Jebs

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    Good luck Martin! :eusa_clap
     
  18. Helen

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    Good luck Martin (*hug*)
     
  19. BreakingGlass

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    Good luck Martin! :icon_bigg
     
  20. Wander

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    Just remember, if it goes poorly, you only have yourself to blame.

    :wink:
     
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