At an impasse

I live in Turkey and majority of the people here are Muslim (including me), but my religion forbids homosexuality so people here usually are not okay with gay people. I've been in the closet since I was a little child and it always made me feel lonely and out of place. I've always been afraid of how people would react to me and how their opinions of me would change if I told them. I never told people I like girls, but I never told them the truth either so I've been lying by omission. I had a huge crush on a guy in the same class with me back when I was in high school and over time we became best friends. Then I started to feel guilty about being dishonest with him and after a while the guilt started to overwhelm me. I knew that he is straight and the girl she had a crush on was a friend of mine, so I never expected him to feel attracted to me. But I decided that I needed to be honest with the person I call my best friend and tell him about the feelings I had for him, without expecting anything from him. It was really hard for me to come out to him but in the end I did it. Although he didn't say or do anything bad to me, he began getting distant and our close friendship ended because of that. I was devastated back then, not just because I lost my best friend but also because I saw firsthand that what coming out could cost me. 2 years ago, while I was attending to the 2nd semester of university, all the bottled up feelings about being gay, being in closet and what future might bring started to get to me. I was about to break down (and I did, a little) and that's when I told my parents that I am attracted to males. They didn't take it well. My mother got furious whenever we talked about this and they tried to "talk me out of it". When I realized that I would get no support from them, I stopped talking about the subject and now both me and my parents avoid the subject. It feels like I didn't come out at at all, except when subjects like these come up it gets a bit tense. They always talk as if I'm straight. My closest friend in university has some gay friends but she has a very low opinion of them and always talks trash about them. I told her before that I had some issues that affect me psychologically and she tried to guess what it was about. One of the things she said was "Don't you tell me you are gay..." I told her "Of course not." because I was afraid but the moment I said that I hated myself for doing it. I'm tired of pretending to be someone else. I want to come out completely but I can't do it here. I don't want to deal with all the people and their views, nor do i have the energy to do that. I'm planning to move out to another, more tolerant country the moment I can, but I don't know if that will ever happen. I just hope I get to live as who I am one day.