I am 16.. I am not out of the closet.. And today it finally hit me that i had to admit to myself i am into females.. I 'm always avoiding it. my family likes to joke around all the time and my aunts asked me Before "are you gay? Why dont you have a boyfriend ever?" I only had one boyfriend all my life idk guys just dont attract me emotionally. Yeah i sometimes see guys and think they're cute . Does that make me bisexual? I knew i liked females around 8 because i kissed a girl and i liked it.. I also had a huge crush on my middle school teacher.. And now i like this lady at the gym.. She makes me feel butterflies when i see her.. I never felt anything for a guy the way i do with females. Back to where i sometimes find males attractive? Its just a "he's cute" but dont see myself with them. I mean if i fell inlove with a guy soo be it im open but i doubt i would because of how im connected to woman emotionally. I'm confused and if someone asked me what my orientation is what would i say?
So, labels can be complicated or you can stay simple, whatever feels more comfortable for you. If you're attracted to guys and girls but only want to date girls, you could be described as homoromantic bisexual. If you don't like that label and/or you want to simplify, you could just choose lesbian or bisexual, depending on whether sexual attraction or romantic attraction is more important to you when telling people about your sexuality. Another thing to think about: there's a difference between seeing a guy and thinking he's cute and actually being attracted to guys. The question I generally ask myself is 'would I want to make out with this person?' I sometimes find guys to be quite cute but there are very few guys I've really be attracted to, so I consider myself to be pretty much only attracted to girls. Good luck figuring out your orientation
When people are struggling to understand their orientation I normally advise them to set the labels aside for the time being, follow their feelings and let things take their natural course. Trying to find an exact label can just add to confusion. The one thing that does seem settled is that you are not straight, so you can definitely put that issue to bed. If your family, or anyone else asks if you are gay (and you are comfortable talking about it) you could simply reply by saying that you are not straight and leave it there for now. That's up to you though. Take your time and don't put yourself under pressure. There are stages to pass through on the coming out journey and you are just working through them.
I think that it is important to remember that there is a wide spectrum of attraction. Some people only date the opposite sex, while others only date the same sex. Then there are people in between. Also, some people have always known their sexual identity and orientation, while others take time to realize and come to terms with theirs. I am a 15 year old girl and I have taken years to come to terms with who I am. I still have days where I am not sure if I know what I feel. When I was 13 I realized I was becoming attracted to girls as well as guys. I figured I was probably bisexual. However, since then I have felt similar feelings to what you described. I can recognize when a boy is attracted, however feel no emotional attraction to him. Based on the feeling that I have for girls are much stronger as well as being not only physical, but emotional, I am beginning to come to terms with the fact that I am probably a lesbian. Remember though, there is no rush. Come out as what you want when you feel ready. So far I have only come out as bisexual; that way if I ever am attracted to a guy, the option is open without those that I have come out to being confused.
