So I have sort of come out to my parents but I recently got a girlfriend. I am a pansexual female. They already knew i had my first girlfriend ( they didnt like it) and now i have another. Should i just not tell them because i know their response wont be supportive at all? Im really confused.
Only you can decide that. Do you need your parents support still? Or are you independent. Well my coming out to my parents went well, I still waited until I was independent of them.
When I'm thinking about "coming out" to someone, I use a rating system - yeah, it's calculating and cheesy, but it makes sense to me: on a scale of 1-10 rate the following 2 things (think of each number as a percentage of how much it would affect your life; 10%, 20%, 30%, etc.) - 1.) How much will coming out affect my life in a negative manner over the next 6 months (what problems do I foresee, are the risks involved very high)? And, 2.) How much will it eat away at me if I hold it in over the next 6 months (in a way that I would feel truly rewarded mentally for coming out and getting it off of my chest no matter what their reaction is)? I try to be as honest with myself as possible. And, if the 2nd number is larger than the 1st number, I go for it. I think coming out to someone takes incredible confidence, bravery, and an ability to see things through. To have those things, you personally have to be in it, and if you have more doubts than confidence about what the outcome may be, it may be good to wait until you hit a point where the risks don't outweigh the reward. Because when you are at a point mentally where, no matter what happens, the reward outweighs the risk, it's very easy to be confident about what you are doing. And that confidence will rub off on them.
Would they treat you any worse than they did with your previous girlfriend? The good thing about hitting rock bottom is - the only way is up. When you had your previous girlfriend, did you care a lot about what your parents thought about your relationship? If not, why do you suddenly care about what they think now? Peace! (*hug*)
