Has anyone who was questioning confide in someone that you were questioning your sexuality only to have them reply that yes, they believed/thought you were gay? Did it move things along for you? As far as solidifying your feelings/self-knowledge?
When I told my sister I had a crush on a girl, she said, "I knew you were a lesbian." Then I said, "Or bisexual." And she said, "No, you're definitely a lesbian. There's no way you like guys." It kinda did make me think. A week or two later, I decided I was a lesbian.
No one but yourself can figure out whether or not you're gay just because people think you are or suspect it doesn't mean anything. It is a hard thing to do but you need to answer that for your self.
Notice how they are jumping to conclusions, rather than confirming something to you? You confide that you are questioning, but they take it to mean that you are (or think you are) gay. They are simply making a leap on the basis of what they heard. You say questioning, but they hear, and tell themselves gay. I don't think you can take anything from this sort of situation.
I agree with what the others have said (only you can know). Saying that though, having a person (or people) in your life who is okay with you being gay - even if you don't know if you are or not yet - makes the possibility of being gay a lot less scary/crazy/weird etc... Less fear = less confusion Peace! (*hug*)
Thanks for the replies. The scenario was hypothetical. I'm just wondering whether confiding while still questioning might be less fraught than once you've accepted/concluded your particular sexuality. I don't know. It just seems less daunting because its not an actual statement of fact but of intent to pursue this train of thought. I guess later you could say "remember that questioning I was doing? I was right, I am X/Y/ or Z." Again, I don't really know what I'm talking about.... So there you have it.
Yeah, kind of. Ironically it was the guy I was in a long term relationship with at the time. I told him I was seriously questioning my sexuality and he said I was probably a lesbian because of reasons a, b, c...etc.
