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Should I come out?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by OneProblem, Jul 10, 2014.

  1. OneProblem

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    I really want to over Facebook because it would be easier to just not deal with it but I'm too scared to see how everyone will react like my family and my friends. Should I just wait till I'm done school or something and then I think that'll be easier because I won't have to deal with school or should I do it while I am in school. Either way I'm sure I would probably lose a lot of friends either way but I'm seriously debating which one I should do and I need some help deciding. :help:
     
  2. ABeautifulMind

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    A little more info would help.

    Are you dependent on them for anything?
    Do they accept LGBT?
    Will you be kicked out of your home?
    What school are you in? high school?

    Anyways, when to come out is something only you can decide, You have to be ready. There are a few ideas that most people suggest. If you are financially dependent, wait til your not. As far as facebook. I personally think it is too impersonal, and that even writing a letter is better.

    Furthermore, you may be surprised with your friends. You maynot lose as many as you think.
     
  3. OneProblem

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    Sorry I'll fill in all the things that you said. :/

    Well I'm sort of dependent on just my mom cause I live with her and also I don't think I'd get kicked out. As for my friends without them I would be even more non-sociable so that would not be very good for my emotional standings at the moment. All of my other family I am moved away from at least 500 kilometers so I wouldn't have to worry about them.

    I feel like my mom would be sort of accepting but I'm scared it would get too awkward for us. I don't think my friends have any other friends that are LGBT but I am mostly guessing that they wouldn't take it lightly because they joke about it a lot.

    I'm in high school right now so it wouldn't be too long till I got out but it would also be the worst two years of my life I'm guessing.
     
  4. imsofancy92

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    I never came out. My parents figured it out and never kicked me out. I never felt ready and ive been sure of my sexuality since early childhood. If your not ready dknt do it. And facebook? Really. Sounds pretty immature.
     
  5. uniqueness

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    Only if you're ready.
     
  6. DoctorWatson

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    Ditto. I read this article a while ago (completely forgot what it was called or who wrote it) about when to come out of the closet. It said something along the lines of "you should only come out when the pain of staying in the closet becomes worse than the pain you think you might experience if you come out of it."

    If you think coming out may cause you unnecessary grief, I say wait it out a little bit. Take things slow. Give yourself as much time as you need because matters like this need to be given sincere thought. :slight_smile:

    In my opinion, Facebook is not really the way to go. Rather than making a big announcement and leaving things pretty ambiguous, try and make it a little more personal. Like ABeautifulMind said, you could consider writing a letter.
     
  7. Candace

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    If I were you, I'd come out when you're self-sufficient, as in living in your own place and have your own job/income, etc. That way, if the worse should happen, then you have a safe haven. This is just my suggestion and I hope everything goes well.

    Also, take into account that you're announcing your sexuality to people whose opinions don't really matter. Like the person above me stated, it'd be a wiser choice to come out to those who really matter. The ones who don't really matter, and are just friends on Facebook, there's no reason to tell them unless they specifically ask.