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What age?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Nick14, Jul 14, 2014.

  1. Nick14

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    This is my first post so here goes!

    I'm new here so I'm not sure if this post has been made anywhere else. I am 16 (I'm not sure what my profile says, i think i put in 20-something by mistake) and not out yet. I wanted to know what ages you guys came out? just to get an idea of a good time for me to do so. Having said that, i do understand that i should come out only when I' ready and age shouldn't really matter but i a interested nevertheless.
     
  2. Kj802

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    Hey,
    As of yet I have not come out, but I am planning on coming out when I am financial independent. On the small chance that my parents don't take it we'll I can still continue to live life. But for many people that Isn't necessary, they just come out when they are ready and hope for the best. :slight_smile:
     
  3. Dismusical789

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    As you said you should come out when your ready I'm 19 and still hiding in the closet I wish I wasn't but every time I've felt close to being ready something has knocked me back
     
  4. chloecoo

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    I think if u feel ready to do it and strong enough then u should. But I haven't yet and I'm trying to figure everything out and I'm not the best person to be giving advice but I think people come out at all different ages and I really hope that if u do it goes well and they accept you. Good luck!!! hugs
     
  5. ResidentTheatreKid

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    I'm out to anyone but family at 14. It's all about when you are confident and comfortable enough to :slight_smile:
     
  6. Nick14

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    Thanks for the quick replies!
    After a lot of though, i think I might (notice i said 'might', haha) to my brother and close friend this weekend when my friend comes over. I know my brother will accept me (we're twins so he could probably just read my mind or something right? haha) and my friend knows someone else who is gay and is fully accepting of him. So im hoping all goes well!
     
  7. Hyaline

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    I came out at 22....But that was in 1997. But, the times were a bit different.

    Wait until you are ready... But keep in mind that most adults are likely to have the knee jerk reaction of "it's just a phase" when you come out earlier (say 15 or younger). The truth is that most adults know that often as teens we had lots of life changes that affected how we see the world. So that teen years experience gets places on your shoulders.

    If you have a really supportive family and they have questioned you, be brave and honest and tell them. But if your environment isn't such that you can stay safe, then put it off until you are in a position to keep yourself out of harms way..
     
  8. bigcityboy

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    It's actually funny how similar my situation is to yours. I'm sixteen, and I just came out about two and a half weeks ago to my twin brother and two of my close friends who are pretty liberal. They all took it great, my brother seemed to know already because he had asked me a few times in the past, even when I said "no." Your brother will probably have a very similar reaction if you have a close relationship. I was ready when I did it, so you should only do it when you are. Picking the right people to tell at the beginning is also pretty important, pick friends or family that you know will accept you, especially if they're gay themselves or know gay people. Trust me, you feel a lot better after telling someone you can trust, and if they're supportive, they'll treat you like nothing's changed at all.
     
  9. iamjustababy

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    I'm 13 and almost out to every one, only my mother left!
     
  10. esc1010

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    When ever you want! Just make sure that you are proud when you do it. :wink:
     
  11. Rancid

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    If I remember correctly, the first person I came out to was my sister at age... 12? It might've been even a little earlier than that. I've been aware of my attractions for as long as I can remember. Of course, I understand them better as I get older. At the time I think it was a pretty laid-back situation, and the topic came up casually. Around age 14-15 I started sharing my feelings with some friends. Recently my sister outed me to my mother, who promptly shared the info with the rest of my family. I planned on waiting longer to tell the rest of my family but, heh, didn't turn out like that.

    I sincerely hope you are able to come out comfortably and at your own pace. Keep well during any rough patches you may encounter, remember there is support for you :slight_smile: Best of luck!!!
     
  12. MindvsHeart

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    Well, I told my sister that I was possibly lesbian but confused when I was 14 and she was cool with it but I didn't talk about it after that. I didn't come out fully until I was 18 (this year) to her again and I was pretty confident about it this time around, both my gender and sexual/romantic orientation and she is super supportive.

    But I think it's up to you really what time is right.
    I'm going to wait a bit until I come out to my mom. Quite possibly when I'm in a steady relationship but who knows...
     
  13. sammy1

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    Still havnt told my parents and I'm almost 24 :frowning2: but I've came out to 4 friends at different ages. The first time I ever told anyone I was I think age 14
     
  14. eternallyapril

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    I started to come out to myself and my close friends when I was 14. I came out at school at 15, and at 16 I am fully out.

    I used to think that I would come out my junior year or even my senior of high school, but it turned out that I was ready a bit earlier and it was just the right thing for me to come out.

    Come out when you are ready, when you are ready you will know because the closet will feel suffocating.
     
  15. uniqueness

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    Come out when you are ready. 18 is a safe bet.
     
  16. Bolt35

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    I "came out" as a bisexual when i was 14?, to friends and one or two family members

    then i figured myself out and found out that i'm actually gay so i came out to the rest of my family and a few of my closest friends at 22, so don't fret about it too much. these kinds of things does take time.
     
  17. idream

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    I'm hopefully going to come out to my mother soon...I'm nearly 16
     
  18. GeekMonkey

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    I came out as bisexual at 15 and as a lesbian like two years later.
    Then again it was always clear to both myself and others that I have no interest in men whatsoever, so idk what made me take that long.
     
  19. Candace

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    I came out to my mom and friends when I was 19. I still haven't come out to my dad yet :/
     
  20. girlpower

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    Hey! Anytime is a good time.. It totally depends on the circumstances.. your family.. your friends.. your bonding and comfort with them. If you think your family or friends will understand you.. and you cant lie to them anymore.. then just go for it. And if you think they wont be very supportive and you might have to move out of the house.. then wait until you can be on your own.

    I am still not out to anyone around me. I am working.. can afford to live separately but its still doesnt feel right to come out to my parents so i am waiting when I have the courage. And anyway i would to come out to my friends first.