Sorry if my english can be bad sometimes, I'm from Norway and I'm not that great at writing large forum posts in english.. This is my first post on this site btw! :icon_bigg Let me start by writing a few things about me: I've always had more female than male friends, which have caused bullying and people calling me gay when I was 14-15, but that's over now (the bullying part) I have had several girlfriends, but I have started to be more interested in my sexuality and discovering who I really am. Just thinking about my sexuality makes me very confused, but I think I might be gay, or at least bisexual but most interested in guys. I think I am fairly good-looking, always been a little popular around girls. I used to be very shy, but after a summer job in a theme park, I'm much more outgoing:lol: In may this year, I started talking with a girl (I will call her S) one year younger than me because I was interested in her, and I fell in love. I'm not in love with her anymore, but I still have some feelings for her, and we are very good friends. (she is the only one I have told I am a bit curious but she were drunk so not sure if she remembers, but I think she does) --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- And now, my story/problem/dilemma I am now in High School, and when I first started here, I became good friends with four girls. We have kind of been a group of friends who always hangs out together at school and in the weekends and such. I do have some other friends (5 male ones, 10+ female ones), but I don't hang out with them really. We are very good friends, but I haven't told anyone that I am curious, even though I think they might suspect it. Reason for this is because I'm a closed person when it comes to personal stuff (But I am trying to change this!!! It's going good for now, but there's room for improvements). Anyway, recently, my friends from our group sort of brought in two guys, which is great! They are two nice guys and I like them a lot. Especially one of them. I'll call him "B". B and the other guy were friends with one of the girls in our group, and she introduces them to us. We started to hang out with them, and now they're basically in our group. I have gotten to know B very well, and I feel like he is my best male friend (He has a lot of other friends, so not sure if I am one of his best, but I hope so!!). I am quite interested in him, but I'm not sure how serious my feelings are, I can't stop thinking about him, that is for sure. We got this thing, where we almost act gay with each other (he doesn't know I might be, and I'm pretty sure he's straight, but you never know), we kind of flirts with each other and we're not afraid of body contact with each other. Why I suspect he MIGHT be a little interested is because something that happened when our group of friends went to a cabin together (this was when I didn't know him that much): The night after we arrived we started drinking, everyone except him (he just didn't want to, because we're not legally old enough to drink in Norway), so he were going to watch over us (He said it just was funny, and didn't mind it). Also, just wanted to say that he is not homophobic or anything, I don't think he would mind knowing a gay person. Anyway, we got really drunk and me, B and one girl were going to sleep in the same room (1 double bed and 1 single bed). It ended up with me and B sleeping in the same bed. we snuggled a little bit, me laying with my head on his chest and spooning. He didn't mind even though he was sober. After that we have had this gay-act thingy. We always sit together when we hang out, sometime very close up on each other and maybe with an arm around one of us. Our friends understands it is an act, and since it is summer break right now, I haven't met his male friends, so I don't know how he would act around them. Even one of our female friends said that she ships us so hard, and she asked me later if I really liked him, and if I were gay (I said no). I kind of have feelings for S, but I like B a lot too.. I am very confused and can't think straight when I try to think about both of them and my sexuality. I want to tell them that I am curious but at the same time I don't want B to think that I like him, because I'm afraid it will ruin our friendship. B can act gay with other people, but not as much as he does it with me, but he also seem to be interested in one of the girls in our group sometime. Q: How do I tell my group of friends how I feel about myself? And who do I tell first? (everyone at the same time, one and one??) Is it a chance that B like me, and if he didn't, would he freak out if he knew I was gay/interested in him? Also, maybe you want to know that I am not the most masculine 17 year old, but not the most feminine either. He is pretty much the same as me, maybe a bit more masculine because he plays football I am very sorry if this post got very long, or if it is hard to read/understand. I might have forgotten to add some details, so don't mind asking for whatever you want to know! THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR READING :icon_redf
I think you should tell S first, because you said she was a close friend, right? You also mentioned that you told her that you were curious before, so if she reacted positively when she was drunk, even if she didn't remember, she'll probably be cool with it. I think B might like you, yeah, and I don't know if he would freak out if he knew you were interested. But you said he wasn't homophobic, so I don't think it he would freak out about that. Best of luck!
You can tell them however feels right: if you want to sit them all down and tell them, or if you want to tell them one at a time, just make sure you feel comfortable. As for B, he might like you, but there have been a couple threads on this forum of a straight guy flirting/leading on another guy who questions his attractions and becomes attached due to the attention. So I don't want to discourage you from exploring/trying stuff out, but be wary of overinterpreting B's behavior as genuine interest.
After reading this, I would suspect that B likes you and that you should tell S, since she seems like the one whom you can confide in the most.
So, I talked with S about it again, this time she were sober. She remembered it and was completely fine with it, which I knew she were going to, since her cousin is gay (Not my type at all, though), I still haven't figured out if I like both girls and guys or just guys.. I wanna hear more thoughts about this.. Anyone?
Ok really late and my first comment on this site. I may not be experienced ,only being 15, but I'm similar to you. Mostly girl friends. Curious, I'm openly bisexual now, and a guy problem. I would , just me, try and discreetly ask if he is interested in guys. Like try and make it a third party reference see what he would do in the situation. If he isn't in to the D then back up. Don't try and force it. If he is wait a little bit then ask him if he wants to hand out one day after school/college/work. Sorry if you already got through this stuff but this is what I would personally do.
