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why do I hate him?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Samus610, Sep 1, 2008.

  1. Samus610

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    For some odd reason I hate my ex Jason. And I don't know why. At first I thought it was because he never really tried to be my boyfriend in the first place. But when I hung out with him on Saturday, I got pissed when he made any of the bad jokes that he usually does and I forced myself to laugh just to be nice. And when there was an awkward silence. I felt weird. Like he was staring at me or thinking about me. And I hated it. I just can't stand to be around him. And the weird thing is that I broke up with him like about two weeks ago and I was happy when I didn't have to be around or talk to him. But he isn't mean or anything. He is really nice. But I just can't stand him! I just don't want to stop being friends. If anyone can give me a reason to why I hate him all of a sudden. That would really help.
     
  2. silentsound

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    I have this problem with an ex boyfriend too. Just try to quietly avoid him and be civil when you have to interact. It's just natural. No matter how clean the breakup was, there is always going to be some awkwardness. Don't sweat it, just try to forget about him.
     
  3. Alexander

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    You probably hate him because your brain is trying to rationalize why you broke up.
     
  4. Mirko

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    Hi there! It's quite possible that by hanging out with him you started asking questions including why did you break up with him. You have a number of contradictory things going on here. Some of those things remind you perhaps of why you broke up with him, while others remind you as to why you fell in love with him in the first place. Some of those things perhaps bring out the best in him. It is possible that you are still in love with him at some level. Your desire to remain friends with him is a sign that you still enjoy his company and want to spend some time with him.

    That said, and given that you stated that you hated it when he starred at you and you can't stand to be around him and felt better and happier when you were not with him, you have to ask yourself as to how much contact you want to have with him. Maybe you need to make a clean brake and just move on. Maybe instead of hanging out with him, try hanging out with other friends or try to make some new friends to get your mind concentrating on something else for now. Try to create some distance between the two of you and at a later date try to be his friend again and see how you feel about the friendship.

    It is really up to you as to how you want to proceed.

    I hope this helps a bit!
     
  5. Samus610

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    Thank you that really helped. But I was never in love with him. I was in love with the fact of being in love.