I'm sensitive and scared

I wish I could say that others opinions of us shouldn't matter, but they do. If you are really afraid of peoples reactions when you come out, you don't have to come out yet. Only do so when you feel comfortable doing so, and feel like you will be able to deal with the consequences. I'm not saying to hide in the closet forever, just until you're sure you're ready.

 

If you aren't ready to face people's reactions, then you don't need to tell them yet. There's no rush. Just remember, if you do decide to tell them, they'll react in their own ways. How they react is not a reflection on you, it's a reflection on them. Although it may hurt for the time being if someone rejects you for being authentic, it will only hurt them in the long run. While you become accepting of yourself, they will remain closed-minded.

 

Well it's been said, you don't have to come out if you're not ready.

Also, I'm a very sensitive guy too and I do get you're scared and worried about what other people will think of you when you finally come out, but I've given this issue a lot of thought and have come to the conclusion that honestly I don't really care about most of the people who will end up finding out I'm not straight. I only really care about the opinion of about 20 people - close family, closest friends. I think as soon as you realise you're surrounded by people you get on with but are not actually friends with, then the prospect of coming out becomes less overwhelming. For example, I get on with my cousins but I honestly don't care if none of them are supportive of me when they find out about my sexuality. Same goes for people at uni, 'friends' from school, etc.

Of course everyone will have their opinions and thoughts on you and your sexuality, and it's perfectly fine worrying about it. Just make sure the opinions you're caring about are those of people who actually matter to you, otherwise worrying is silly and just altogether pointless. That's the way I see it anyway

 

Sensitive and scared seems like a reasonable place to be when your going potentially alone into unchartered territory with something that is very personal to you. Perhaps it doesn't have to be a firework display of notification, would it be easier to just tell the people that matter most to you, one at a time, easiest and more reliable first?

I don't believe people should come out before they are ready and only they know when that is right for them. Looking at all the different posts on here its easy to see how different each persons situation and experiencing is around this.

Have you been considering this for long? What do you think may happen?

 

Coming out is scary, even for the most confident among us. When we come out we are taking a step into the unknown, with no certainty of how people will react. Is it just the reaction and opinions of others that is so scary, or is it something deeper? Can you maybe tell us exactly what you find most scary?

Of course, you don't have to come out right now, but I'm guessing there is a good reason why you really want to. Can you maybe tell us about that too?