I know it serves the wider noble purpose of helping folks in general to become more accepting of lgbt folk, since someone they know quite well, and like and / or respect has just come out to them that they are, say, gay or bi; but what if I tell my neighbours and they don't accept me anymore? They have been good friends to me over the years. I feel as though I would possibly be sacrificing my good relations with my neighbours, for the sake of helping the lgbt cause in the wider sense. Any advice here would be helpful, thank you.
Feeling more free to be who you are. For most people, even if the reaction is bad, they still feel like a big weight has been lifted off their shoulders.
Mm, if you don't feel comfortable telling your neighbors, don't. It's not really worth it to risk your comfort or safety for the abstract furthering of our cause. :c
you dont need to come out just to make people more accepting of lgbt, you only need to come out to make your life better if you choose to
Hi Yuri, I can see your point...hiding it all the time will, one day, feel like a burden. ---------- Post added 24th Jul 2014 at 06:41 AM ---------- Hi Sabot, I can also see your point. I'm struggling enough personally as it is, maybe I don't need any potential added stress in my life at present. ---------- Post added 24th Jul 2014 at 06:45 AM ---------- Hi Peacemaker, considering what you say, I think the answer is to wait until such a time that I am so comfortable within myself about my sexuality, that telling others becomes something that enhances my life regardless of their reaction. thanks everyone for your replies, I feel as though my question has been pretty much answered already... Damien
I kind of feel the same way Damien...I am out to quite a few friends, work colleagues, my kids but I feel (about telling) my parents like you do about coming out to your neighbours. On one level I can appreciate that it might alleviate the stress and hurt of living a lie...pretending to be someone I'm not but I would just be swapping it for a different kind of hurt, disappointment and stress that might actually be harder to handle than the first...I think at the end of the day you have to live your life in a way that is right for you...
If they do not accept you, then they haven't been good friends, have they?! Coming out will show you who your true friends are. It will also mean that you can be open about yourself.
I think coming out serves as a way to positively affirm your own existence, not challenge or threaten your neighbors and friends. Hopefully, as true friends, they will continue to support you no matter what.
it means, for me, that you can step outside those walls that you built to keep you "safe" that are so tall and thick and see the world with free eyes and the world can see you as you really are ( that's the scary part i think) just to add, no one should have to come out to anyone they don't want to. my plan is that when my son knows, i intend to live and if folks find out good for them i don't plan on hiding but i also don't plan on taking an add out in the local paper either.
In my case its living a lie which I myself am emotionally being damaged by. Imagine people constantly telling you "Do you like xx," "Look at this xx's xx" or "when are you getting married to xx". After awhile it just feels horrible, and emotionally not worth it. Since coming out I've felt a lot more free and happy. I've felt like I'm slowly knowing who I am, what I like and where I'm going. It's like being tied to a tentpole for 20+ years and finally letting lose. Is there anything truly better than freedom? Or at least feeling like you're free?
