Firstly i have decided that when i go to uni i will let people know from the start-kinda like a clean slate etc so its just out there and i don't have to hide it. It will be next year that i go to uni, as this is my last year of school. Basically im wondering if there is any point in coming out? There aren't any gay people i want to know im gay to get with or anything. So if im going to get a bf its gonna be outside of school. Im just wandering if it would actually achieve anything by coming out. It might be difficult etc and is this worth it when i only have a year left? Its not like im living a lie. Im completely myself at school and im not under pressure to go out with girls or anything. I suspect that my friends think i am gay anyway. So id just like people's opinions on if it is worth it really?
It sounds to me like you don't have a burning need to come out - so don't bother. It's not like it totally defines who you are - it's only a part of you. I'd leave it alone from the sounds of it.
I guess i would say that if its your last year and you are feeling ok with not telling people then may be best to wait until you start uni. Considering its your final year at school im presuming your doing your a'levels and i guess do you feel it would be easier for yourself if u were to come out or maybe best to wait. i would say unless you feel ready to come out then may be best to wait.
I would just say act like everyone already knows, but if you don't feel an overwhelming urge to tell people directly, just don't bring it to anybodies attention, i mean, people don't ask you if you're straight if you don't appear gay, do they? you gotta do what you feel is best for you good luck x
Hi there! It is really up to you if you want to come out to people that you know or will get to know over the last school year. If you think that it would be good to come out, given that you think that your friends are already suspecting that you are gay, it might be worthwhile. If they are supportive and accepting you could maybe try coming out to a couple of your friends. Come out to one person at a time. Take it slow. Coming out to friends who you think already suspect something could help you perhaps to put your mind to ease because they know then and that's that. Often even if we are being ourselves, we still feel as if there is something missing because we know that we haven't told our friends everything, which could cause some added stress. That added stress could increase if we have the feeling that they might suspect something. You might find yourself with the feeling of hiding something given that you are being and trying to be yourself. At the same time, and even though you might not feel it right now, it is possible that the feeling of hiding something could become stronger over time. But if you feel that it might be too difficult to come out to them then wait until you go to the uni and as you said start with a clean slate. Hope this helps!
I agree with nodoubtjunkie. Just act like everyone already knows. I came out my last year in high school, but that was because I felt like I was living a lie. Its up to you wether you think you should or not. If someone asks you, then tell them. That's how I do it. I'm heading to college tomorrow and if someone asks if i'm bi, i'll tell them. You don't need to run around announcing it or wearing rainbows all over your clothes. (I do, just because I love being flamboyant....And it annoys my mom. ) Just be yourself.
If there's really no pressure and you're happy where you are, just chill. If your school is accepting and your friends would be fine, go for it. You might just find you're carrying around a little more weight than you thought, and if it is your last years what have you got to lose?
I haven't come out, but for some people it's a great idea. Sorry no help from me...only one girl at school knows I'm into girls and she's cool and doesn't tell. I won't come out to my school, since they are very homophobic and often bash gay/bisexual women/men.
Depends on your situation. Some people come out and find it a horrible way to live. Others, like me, have people who care no matter what my personal situation is and that makes all the difference. You gotta have people you know will support you. If you question that at all, make new friends (family is another story) or stay in the closet. Nothing sucks more than being out and having people hate you for it.
You come out when "the risk of staying in the closet exceeds the risk of coming out." If you're under no pressure then you don't really need to. Still, it's always good to be honest with people you meet, so I wouldn't lie to someone who asks.
I think it's just a personal choice. If you feel like it is a burden on your behalf to "hide" that you are gay, then by all means tell people. But that doesn't mean you should just flaunt it and tell everyone you meet, right when you meet them. If asked, Don't Deny it Otherwise, just let people figure it out for themselves.
I'm in the same position as you It's probably not worth it now anyways, but if you feel that people already know, then it probably won't hurt to tell people you know would be fine with it...
thankyou for the advice everyone. Basically ive chatted with my best friend (one of the few people who knows) and i've decided that if any of my friends ask i'll tell them. I don't have to bring it up or anything, but if one of them just comes straight out and asks me i'll tell them. Its funny actually coz i know they all gossip about if i am or not, and if one of them just had the balls to ask me, rather than gossiping behind my back, they would find out for certain! anyway thanks everyone
