So I'm on the stage of accepting that I've always been a bisexual, still not ready to tell everyone, because right now I rather focus on myself than pay attention on what other's have to say about my life. Getting to the point of the sub-forum, I have a question about the future, relationship wise. I have no partner at the moment, but when I have one, what do I do? Do I tell my partner that I'm bisexual? When shall I do so, at the very begin, later on? Do I don't say a word?
You can't have a relationship without trust, and so if you don't feel like you can tell people you trust that you're bi, then no. But if you can tell people you trust, then it shouldn't be a problem.
So, I should come out to everyone before I do so to my future partner? What I meant was, when dating someone should I say so at the very begin then? I know a relationship requires trust, I never dated someone I didn't trust as I never had a short term relationship, but during my previous relationships I did deny myself the fact that I'm bisexual so I never told to my partner.
I would recommend being open to your partner about your sexuality at the beginning of your relationship. The reason for this being that you want to make sure you're with someone who loves you, regardless of who you are. You may find that, if you come out in the middle of a relationship, they may be heavily against it and you will have wasted so much of your time for someone who can't look past your small details. I'd say that someone who can't love you for being bisexual is someone who doesn't deserve to be with you at all.
I'll sign that. Compute is absolutely right, tell your partners at the very beginning of the relationship for the reasons Compute stated, and for saving you alot of drama if you decide to come out to them later on... been there myself. It's not pretty. :dry:
I agree with being honest early on. However, you need not blurt it out straight away. You see, a lot of people may have certain preconceptions about bi people and may be put off. Now, I know some may say that that you shouldn't date someone like that, but it may not necessarily be their fault regarding these preconceptions as they may have just been fed a load of misinformation regarding bi people and not met any to contradict that. In this instance, it's sometimes good to get to know them a bit first and show them what a wonderful person you are. That way, when they find out, any preconceptions should fall away and you can show them what a bi person is really like and that it doesn't change anything about the person you are and who they have decided to go out with. All that's changed is they know one more thing about you. Hope that helps a little, Happy days
"at the very begin" If it's a deal breaker for him/her, so be it, you won't have to go through a painful break up in the future. I tend to believe that if you commit to a girl, it'll be probably easier, if it's a guy, there might be some awkward moments.
Thanks a lot everyone for your advice, specially Compute. Radioactive Bi you are right, better show that person first how a bi really is. Luchel, I have no preference on dating a girl or a boy, if I fall, I do so for the person, their character, not their gender but yes probably telling a male partner might be awkward, depending on his character I guess but as you say if that's a deal breaker for him/her so be it.
If I were you, I would tell at the beginning. Nothing sets a more sturdy foundation of a relationship than trust right from the start. If you wait till later, they could feel betrayed and that would only make more problems.
