An old friend has come out, and I want to talk to him about it

I was wondering if you guys could help me with this.

The other day, I wrote this blog, about how I found out that one of my good friends from school has come out (let's call him D). I also mentioned in the blog entry that I really want to talk to him about it. However, I am so nervous about it!!! Last night D was on MSN and I tried to have a chat with him, but the conversation was so brief that I barely got a chance to talk about anything at all (the conversation was literally hello; how are you; what are you doing these days - and I didn't even get a response to the last part). While that has demoralised me (I had to really psych myself up just to start the conversation with him because I was so nervous), I am not going to give up on trying to chat to him.

The reason for this thread is that I have a few questions that I want advice on before I do anything else.

How do I bring up the subject with D? I don't want to act dumb and pretend that I don't know until D brings up the subject himself, nor do I want to appear to be confrontational. That said, yesterday he added me to Facebook and he doesn't hide his sexuality on there so he could just assume that I read it on there.

Do you think that it would be a good idea to come out to him?

If I don't see D online again some time soon (like in the next week or so), should I just send an email instead? I don't really want to talk about it by email, especially because I haven't spoken to or seen him in such a long time (and I want to catch up on a lot more news than just his coming out), but I don't really see much other choice if D isn't online when I am.

When we were back at school, D and I one day were passing notes in class when he wrote “Are you bi?”, to which I replied “No!” (I didn't feel ready to come out at that stage, but for a few days afterwards I wish I had written “no, I'm gay” :eusa_doh. Ever since then, I have always wondered why he asked. I was going to try and bring it up the next time I spoke with D before I found out that he came out, but should I still ask about it?
(Incidentally, D is only one of two people to have ever question me about my sexuality)

I'm sure that I will probably have more questions later but any input on those ones would be greatly appreaciated.

I know I am probably over-analysing the situation and getting worried over nothing but I just want to be sure that I want to do this and I want to do it properly.

Thanks guys.

 

Thanks for all of your suggestions.

I have been doing some more thinking on this, and rather than waiting for him to come online, I might send D an email and try and arrange to catch up in person for a coffee or something instead. I feel it would give us a better opportunity to catch up (as I have said before, it has been a very long time since we have seen each other) and to me it would be a little bit more personal than writing on a computer screen. I won't mention anything about D's sexuality (or mine) in the email, I will just say that we should catch up and when/if we actually do, I will discuss it then.

I will keep you guys posted if anything happens and I will keep all of your suggestions in mind.