First this is my first post here so hi. Um secondly well... ive just had the epiphany that im bigender and im wanting to show my feminine side to my friends. Anatomically im a guy but I wanna show (specifically to my friends) that I have that other side of me. I swear im actually bi-polar because my dominant side is male and Lynn (which is what I like to be called when the other side shows) is introverted. She only shows up when im alone. But I want to let her see the light. I dont have clothes to facilitate that. But besides thatd show it off to everyone. And im not that bold. So I was wondering how I could let people see Lynn but not to everyone. Um before I forget. I can speak in a feminie range so thats a possibility but its quiet. Help would be greatly appreciated. Thank you.
Do you find you have mannerisms that you restrain? Let them out for a little air. I used to pretty much check every natural movement that came to me because 'that's not how a guy should move/stand/look/talk' and it was horrible. I can't get my voice to stay as soft as I want it when I talk to most people, it's reflexive. But just letting out my real self a bit is making me feel better. You should talk however you want to.
Occasionally act slightly more feminine, or dress a bit more femininely (start with women's pants, not a skirt). People will slowly get used to your swings, and accept them as a part of you. Over time, if you want, you can act and dress more and more femininely. Welcome to EC, and I hope we can help you feel more comfortable with who you are!
Well the thing is I normally dont act girly around other people. Its mainly during times that im wuth myself and thinking (at night before I go to bed) snd I only want to show it to a few people. My friends. I just dont know how to do it. That part is introverted and sht. If I show that. Im gonna freeze and probably let my other half show. Btw is ut stupid that I have names for the two?
I understand the difficulty. But do you really want to care about the opinion of people that would judge you negatively off of something so unimportant as the way you would usually behave? It is totally normal to have a preferred name etc for the person that you want to show. For some people it is only some of the time, for others most of the time, for others all the time. If I could snap my fingers right now everybody would call me as I like etc all the time.
I dont understand what you're saying Kai. And how do I get notifications when someone replies to a thread
I am trying to say that the really worthwhile people don't give a damn about how you move talk or get emotional but about who you are as a person. I know that most of my good friends will support me when I talk to them but I have held off on doing so so far. But I know that they love me for the qualities they perceive about me, whatever their personal doubts. So I know that they will accept me however they have to adapt. I don't think that you should waste time or emotions on giving a damn about how people choose to see you if all they are doing is using it as an excuse to justify ignorant or bigoted behavior. edit: I believe you can subscribe to a thread?
Yes you can sub. And yes thats how. I just figured that out. And thanks. But I dont know how to present myself like that. The only thing working for me us thin frame and good range to my voice. I dont have feminine clothes and dont act very feminine. I guess the latter will come through once Lynn is exposed more?
You can't expect a part of yourself that has been suppressed to come out all at once in full strength. I still feel a lot of doubts but they often feel like the artificial props of pride I used to get confrontational with other guys. Even though it was total bullshit really, I only like fighting when it is for fun, not for anger.
Absolutely. You are the best you that you will ever be. Don't fake it. I thought I could 'fake it till I make it'. Ha. I was shaking like a leaf the whole time inside. You are who you are, and people that can't appreciate that are zombies.
