So I'm about to go to uni and I'm not sure whether or not to come out to my new flatmates. I'm thinking about just sort of casually dropping hints, but I don't know how to do that. I really don't want an awkward conversation but I don't know what to do.
You had pretty good ideas. Leaving a lesbian book or wearing rainbow bracelets, I mean. But, consider if it's really necessary. I think you should give some time to see where they are on LGBT issues. If they're homophobic, for your own safety, I advise you against coming out. Otherwise, you can just drop the hints like you mentioned. Best of luck.
On the residence application was there a place additional details like that? How difficult would it be to switch rooms? If it would be somewhat easy to switch, I'd just tell them flat out, then switch rooms if there's a problem. If it would be difficult to switch, I'd wait and see how they react to LGBT+ things. Your call
I'm going to uni next month as well and it will be the first time I'm ever out to anyone. I will be completely out from day 1. Don't think of your being out as this huge conversation or something you need to tell people. Just be open. If someone asks 'do you have a boyfriend?' you just correct them and say 'You mean a girlfriend', just little things like that. It's your choice whether you want to be out or not but I feel like if I can't be out at uni then I might as well stay closeted forever and tbh I've had enough of the closet bullshit - chances are your flatmates won't care and if they do then let this be a chance for them to get to know someone who's gay, maybe they've never known a gay person before but they will now and it will open their minds a little bit, help them get used to the thought. Honestly you're not doing anyone any favors by starting a new chapter of your life not being yourself. I'm in the same boat as you right now and that's how I see thinks. Which uni are you going to? I'm going to Uni of east Anglia. xo
I am with blue and hm on this one. I think you should just come out day one and not even worry about it. If it does cause problems just request to move. There is no need to hide who you are when you are in a place where you can be your self.
Uni is the perfect opportunity to meet new people and start a fresh. I saw it as a massive chance to finally start being myself and came out gradually over then three years to everyone! People at uni are so open and accepting of everyone which makes it easier. It's weird because nothing seems to shock people at uni. When I told them I was gay it was just like "oh right yeah that's cool, why didn't you tell us sooner". It was no big deal which is the way it should be. One piece of advice though, it's easier to come out to them from the get go rather than leaving it a few months like I did. However, don't come on to them unless you feel ready and you feel as though the time is right. Good luck for starting uni, you'll have the best time I'm sure!
Hi, I'm an Irish guy who has an offer to go to uni in Glasgow, as well as Dublin (I started a thread about this but didn't get anything useful out of it). I'm really torn at the moment. I was wondering if you could give me some insight into lgbt life in Scotland. Are people accepting? Is there any workplace discrimination etc...? Any advice would be really helpful.
etcetera, Scotland's pretty open minded - although Glasgow's quite a rough city. The uni's great but be careful when you're out. blueberrykisses, I'm going to St Andrews. Others, it's near impossible to switch rooms. I think it's worth it though - I don't want to spend the entire year hiding who I am. And thanks everyone
Well I know uni hasn't started yet so hopefully I'm not too late. When I started uni last year I thought I'd just keep my sexuality to myself cos it'd be easier to make friends with my flatmates and just everyone really if I was 'normal'. I mean, I didn't want to jeopardise having an awesome life in the flat due to people having a problem with me liking guys as well as girls. Anyway, I was wrong and I should've come out then. I don't think I should've made it obvious from the get go, but I shouldn't have tried to give the impression that I was straight. If I were you, I'd try to be vague with regard to my sexuality, therefore not giving people the idea that I was straight or gay or bi or whatever - I'd just try to not make my sexuality something they would notice. And then when you've known them long enough and you feel comfortable to talk to them, just caj tell a story that indicates your orientation or mention a crush on a girl or something like that. But please DO come out, people at uni are generally so supportive and accepting and I found all my friends just wanted me to be happy in the end. By all means, take this opportunity and just be yourself. I'm sure you'll meet amazing people and being yourself around your friends and being true to them is amazing! Trust me x
