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Coming Out Tomorrow

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by prussianblue100, Aug 29, 2014.

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  1. prussianblue100

    prussianblue100
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    So, a friend from middle school and I stay in contact with one another through emails. (Phone calls seem too awkward, and I like writing better.) A few days ago, she sent me an email asking if we can hang out. I said yes, and I've decided that tomorrow, I'm going to come out to her. I'm planning to take her in a field near her apartment and talk with her casually for awhile. Then, I'll tell her that I like other girls.

    I'm really excited for tomorrow. The only problem about this is that since she is a girl herself, she could assume I'm trying to tell her that I like her. That thought might scare her and push her away. I do not love her in that way; all I want from her is a platonic friendship. I really don't want that to lose her since we've been good friends for years.

    Basically, I'm pumped about tomorrow, but I need to say it in a way that doesn't make her think that I'm crushing on her. Any advice? :help:
     
    #1 prussianblue100, Aug 29, 2014
  2. ChloeKiss

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    Before you actually come out to her.. Just say look this might make you uncomfortable but just know this.. I value our friendship immensly and what I am about to tell you is just a small part of me. And then after you tell her you're gay tell her that you don't have feelings for her but it's something you've been wanting to get off your chest. Good Luck! (*hug*) x
     
    #2 ChloeKiss, Aug 29, 2014
  3. Anonymous777

    Anonymous777 Guest

    I agree with ChloeKiss. If I were you, I'd tell her I trust her a lot and I really value her friendship. Then, I'd come out to her and I'd make clear that I don't have any romantic feelings about her.

    If you think this is the right moment to tell her, just do it, but I want you to know that there's no need to rush. Anyhow, it seems you've already made the decision so good luck! I hope everything will be OK.
     
    #3 Anonymous777, Aug 29, 2014
  4. Straight ally

    Straight ally
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    Instead of telling her "i'm gay' you could instead say something like: " oh look, that girl over there is so hot' and then tell her you are gay. Ok, maybe not exactly like that, but what i mean is that there are many approachs to coming out, many ways to do it.
     
    #4 Straight ally, Aug 30, 2014
  5. Dakeli27

    Dakeli27
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    Good for you, I'm coming out to my parents this evening! I agree with ChloeKiss, explain that this isn't your defining feature, and that you value your friendship.
     
    #5 Dakeli27, Aug 30, 2014
  6. lovely lesbian

    lovely lesbian
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    Good luck Hun hope it goes well
     
    #6 lovely lesbian, Aug 30, 2014
  7. prussianblue100

    prussianblue100
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    Alright. I'll try to include that I value our friendship and stuff in there somewhere. I'm nervous and excited all at once, but I know that if I don't tell her today, I'll get all mad at myself. Thanks, everyone. :slight_smile:
     
    #7 prussianblue100, Aug 30, 2014
  8. Wuggums47

    Wuggums47 Guest

    Congratulations in advance.
     
    #8 Wuggums47, Aug 30, 2014
  9. Anonymous777

    Anonymous777 Guest

    I admire your courage, especially considering your age. Congrats!
     
    #9 Anonymous777, Aug 30, 2014
  10. YuriBunny

    YuriBunny
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    I'm an introvert; I live in my head.
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    Out to everyone
    Good luck~!
     
    #10 YuriBunny, Aug 30, 2014
  11. prussianblue100

    prussianblue100
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    Okay, here's an update on the whole thing. I just came out to her after staying at her apartment for a bit. I told her that I have something to tell her. She asked what. I was hesitating, and she kept asking what I wanted to tell her. Then, I muttered quickly, "I like girls..."

    I expected her response to be freaking out and stuff. Instead, she said she didn't care and reminded me she was a supporter of gay marriage. Afterwards, she told me that she thought I was going to tell her someone died or something. I felt so relieved. So, we just spent the rest of the time hanging out until my mom picked me up. Now, I feel so much better about it.

    So, we're still friends now. She treated me like normal, just like my sister did. (Although her reaction wasn't as surprised or dramatic as my sister's reaction. XD) I still have a long way to go, but at least a small part of me is out of the closet.

    Thanks for all your support everyone. :grin:
     
    #11 prussianblue100, Aug 30, 2014
  12. Quem

    Quem
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    Out to everyone
    That's excellent! Well done! It's a brave thing to do! (*hug*)
     
    #12 Quem, Aug 30, 2014
  13. looking for me

    looking for me
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    great going. :thumbsup:
     
    #13 looking for me, Aug 30, 2014
  14. Ryujin

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    Well done!
     
    #14 Ryujin, Aug 30, 2014
  15. Silver Sparrow

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    Congratulations!
     
    #15 Silver Sparrow, Aug 30, 2014
  16. amanitomuscario

    amanitomuscario
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    That´s great! I admire your courage at your age :eusa_clap
     
    #16 amanitomuscario, Aug 30, 2014
  17. ChloeKiss

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    Woohoo! Awesome! Happy for you! Very brave chica! x
     
    #17 ChloeKiss, Aug 30, 2014
  18. Anonymous777

    Anonymous777 Guest

    That's amazing! Well done! I'm glad everything was OK.
     
    #18 Anonymous777, Aug 31, 2014
  19. doinitagain

    doinitagain
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    Well done. I'm really happy for you. (!)
     
    #19 doinitagain, Aug 31, 2014
  20. Dakeli27

    Dakeli27
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    You were luckier than me, Prussian! I couldn't find an opportunity...
    Good for you, and I hope you're this successful when you come out to other people.
     
    #20 Dakeli27, Aug 31, 2014
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