Hey guys I've been planning to come out to my mum again but this time in a text message. I live at home and I'm going away for a few days. I did try coming out to mum a year or more ago which didn't really go to plan. I have talked about it in another post but in case you havm't read it ... Short version - she was worried I didn't love my boyfriend, that I would hurt him, that we may be just having a rough patch, we are so good together. Talked about it being a phase and didn't believe me. The subject has never come back up however it's been on my mind daily but i haven't been able to bring it up. My boyfriend and afew close friends know I'm attracted to girls and are fine with it. I guess I'm just wanting to state that it's a fact, I've denied it for some years, to feel more comfortable being myself and that if, In the future I am with a girl it's not a phase.. It's me. I feel an text would be good as she will have time to think about it and deal with it also to realise it wasn't and won't change anything. I'm not some one to talk about feeling and at the moment it's not something I would like to discuss with my mum. Would just like her to know for some reason.... The reason I'm writing this is... Well has any one else come out in a text and has it worked? I'm i doing the right thing ? I really don't think I would be able to answer her questions again face to face. :help:
I've come out multiple times through text but only to friends. It's physically impossible for me to meet with every single one of them and tell them face to face, so texting is the most efficient way to do it for friends. With my mom, though, I plan on telling her myself. I feel like my immediate family deserves to have me say it to their face.
Sorry to seem blunt.. But I think text message to your mum of all people whilst you are away is a bit of a cowards way out to be totally honest.. I think your mother deserves better then that.. She deserves a face to face conversation with her daughter.
I have come out to numerous people via text and believe me, it works. However, a text may not offer some of the same benefits that coming out face-to-face might. A text may be great for friends because you know them; you know they'll probably be okay with it. But for your parents, you may want to see their immediate reaction to see how they feel. Seeing someone's facial expression when you tell them, their body language, etc. can really help you judge how they feel about it. Coming out to your parents via text is absolutely an option, and you have the choice to do it. However, what Blossom85 is saying does have some truth - if there are two people on the planet you should be able to tell face-to-face, it's your parents. I know this isn't always the case though. If your parents are gay-bashers, I certainly wouldn't recommend telling them to their face. Common sense. But to answer your question - yes it is an okay option, and I know people who have done it. I've come out to many friends via text.
Thanks everyone for the replies. I think I really needed to hear that. Your all completely right. Text isn't the right way.
I decided face to face was the right way. I told her that I'm still attracted to girls and that my boyfriend has know about it for a year or more and he is fine with it. She said 'that's okay' and then changed the subject. Thanks again everyone for your help today. I've been watching the minutes past finding the right time to be alone with her and going over and over in my head what I was going to say. Without this site I would still be depressed and hating myself. Thank you
Congrats!! She may have some more questions later, but it's great that the initial response was so accepting. Well done. Very proud of you.
