Is it selfish to me if I just want to keep it to myself? I've thought of this often. I'm not good at personal conversations towards people face to face.
It's not selfish at all, it's your mind and these are your feelings. You may eventually find that you want to let others know, especially if you decide to seek a relationship. But if you are happy just keeping it to yourself for now that's fine. It may help you to kind of "sit with it" and get comfortable on your own for awhile before you decide you're ready to tell anyone. But- if the only reason you don't want people to know is because you don't want to have the conversation, that's a bit of a different story. I am also really bad at conversations like that, but I've found pushing myself to talk with close friends about this has helped me immensely. So if you do feel in the future you want to come out don't let your fear of an awkward conversation get in the way. The way I view it is- you can feel stressed or isolated forever by not saying anything, or you can feel awkward and scared for an hour or so while you talk it out. To me it seems like pushing through those intense emotions for a short period of time is preferable to the long, quiet suffering of keeping it in.
No I don't think its selfish. Truthfully ones sexuality is nobody's business but your own. Personally I hate this need to make a special announcement so I can live my life n date who I want.
