At the moment I'm only out to a select group of close, trusted friends and a couple close family members (but not my parents). I graduated from college earlier this summer, I'm moving away from home to start work, and I'd like to be out to everyone there. I want to be myself, meet new LGBT friends, and start dating. Despite that, I have some worries. 1) I'm not yet ready to come out to my parents. I'll be a fairly long way from home, so there's little immediate worry about them finding out, but there's still social media as well as the possibility that someone accidentally lets something slip around my parents if they visit. I don't want to have to do this whole spiel every time I come out: "So yeah, I'm gay, but my parents don't know yet so I'd appreciate it if you wouldn't post anything about it on <popular social media site> or say anything about it if they're ever around." I've said that sort of thing to the few who currently know, but it's tiring, and it's not fair to those who I'm telling. I don't want to have to qualify things when I come out. I just want to be out, period. 2) On one hand it's nice to have such a carefully curated group of people I'm out to because it gives me a sense of security, but on the other hand I just want to be out. That's scary, though. Coming out to close friends is a big leap, but it's another big(ger?) leap to be out to everyone. The idea of not necessarily being able to keep track of who knows and who doesn't is both exciting and scary. I can't be the only one who's dealt with this. Any advice?
Just casually mention it to people, unless you have a boyfriend who can be mentioned on social media then there is little chance of it happening. If you do take someone with you to visit your parents just tell them you are in the closet (usually when telling them stuff such as their names and such like is a good time)
I've been wondering this, myself, as I'm slowly approaching that point. I haven't yet decided if I want to let the information just disseminate on its own once I tell all of my close friends or if I want them to keep it to themselves so I have more control over it. I too have a lot of family on social media... that's my biggest concern, so I'm also curious how people have handled this. I have been playing around with privacy settings so that family can't see certain things but the privacy settings seem kind of dodgey and prone to change so I'm not sure I totally trust them. As for your parents visiting, would they really meet people who you don't know well enough to know to not out you? When my parents visit it's usually just me and them, or we may meet up with some of my close friends for dinner or something. It's unlikely that you'll have someone you barely know come up to you and your parents while you're visiting and say something that outs you, right?
