As a 15yr old gay in a conservative town in Northern California, I've found it difficult to find love with another guy. At my high school, there are of course guys whom I think are gay and one of which I have a crush on, but I really do not want to ask him if he is. Because that would be just rude, right? How can I find love in high school, because I really wish to. Life. Love. Liberty.
Do not give up!! Become friends with this guy you are talking about. Make an attempt to find out if he is gay himself. If you do not try, You will never know and whilst not knowing this it will eat you up inside. If you're already friends. I suggest having a casual conversation and possibly bring something up about gay rights! See what his reaction is and you never know he might confirm to you that he is gay. Good Luck, JBBB
Hun, you're only 15 -- you have a lot of time to find things! Don't worry about it. And I agree with Lex, where is this conservative town? Lol. I thought most of California was very liberal.
Just try to be his friend if you can. Even if he's not gay or bi, keep him close to your heart and you close to his heart. There's this one guy I really like at my school but he's straight, and I've tried to be his friend, just to get some sort of connection with him.
You could try to find yourself a friend who can help you meet people if you're too nervous to meet him alone. You don't even have to come out to him right away, just build up your circle of friends to include people who are straight but connected to other gay people. Surely there's at least one of those in your school.
Awh, don't feel too down. I'm in the same situation. Its better though to become friends first and be comfortable with each other before asking something personal like that. Don't be impatient because there's still more of life to live. I also got a friend I really like since I've been in high school, but at least being friends is better than nothing!
Aww.. [hugs all around] I'm fully out and I'm lonely as hell. Like I don't even want a sexual relationship, just someone to at least cuddle with..
You don't actually 'find' love. It just happens. But you have to actually be in 'like' with someone before you can be in 'love' with them. While TV and movies suggest that you can fall in love by looking into someone's eyes across a crowded room (or in a busy school hallway) it actually doesn't happen like that at all. And while TV and movies also suggest that 15 year-olds all fall in love and have a bf/gf, that isn't the case either. Lots of people here on EC didn't have a serious relationship at that age - they were much older. So I'd say give it time.
I hear that. I guess I can't expect much considering I just came out to someone for the first time less than two weeks ago. In my school, it's a combination of the attractive (both physically and intellectually) guys are straight, and the handful of gay guys are just not appealing to me (again, both looks-wise, and smarts). And I'm not exaggerating when I say that there's probably a total of 4 openly gay men in my class, and very few people my "gaydar" is picking up on. Keep in mind my graduating class consists of 450+ students. :| Trying to network for gay men as a partially outed gay man is difficult xD.
I've got around 350 guys in my year level, but throughout my entire school there's like 4 or 5 people out of the closet. But they're ALL FREAKING GAYGAYGAY. Like I don't have a problem with people who act extremely gay, but I wouldn't be able to stand a person like that in a relationship (you know, high squealy voice, limp wrist 24/7, wearing extremely tight clothing...). And things are exactly the same for me.. lol. The hot guys all are straight, or they'd have one feature I love and then the rest would be... Odd.
i thought so too... until the past elections when i looked at the county distributions. california mostly votes liberally because of highly concentrated areas of obviously san francisco and LA. san diego (my home) is slightly more conservative as is most of california (by area not population distribution)
Don't give up! You're still have a lot of time in front of you, and you shouldn't lose hope at 15 years old. As a 16 year old in SoCal in an ultra-conservative town, I feel the same. But here's the thing: [points to sig] Love will always find you. No matter where you are. It's weird to think of it that way, but it's true. Love is a natural thing that human beings go through; love comes and goes sometimes, but the point is that you will find someone. You can go places in a few years, especially in Northern California (San Fransisco isn't that far away!) Just give yourself time and opportunities, but don't force yourself into something irrational and out-of-place in your heart; don't make yourself do something just because you want to be in a relationship; wait for the right person--like I said, they will find you, or you'll find them in a totally accidental way. (*hug*) Don't lose hope! -Mesk
I know exactly how you feel about cuddling with someone. I found two amazing men in the states that I'm split between but am currently in Greece. It makes things hard. I prefer cuddling to almost any sexual intercourse though.
Yeah.. I really want to know that I'm loved and that I'm safe with my partner (if I ever get one) not just sex 24/7.
You'll find someone! Just put it into perspective being that you're young yet. As am I. I'm not in a rush to find a partner (slight lie), but when the time comes, and the man is right, you'll know. And I'm anticipating that moment in time
