So for the past year my mormon friend and i started to hang out and stuff like that because me and him like this game called Magic the Gathering. So pretty much we've been getting to know each other and each others families. And i have no clue if I should tell him that im Bi? You think he might over react or anything? Im kinda afraid he wont accept me because hes a mormon, because i think in the movie Prayers for Bobby that there family were Mormons. Idk what do you guys think? I should i? Or wait later?
Hi I think I have some advice. You might want to try testing the waters. Mention something LGBTQ+ and see how your friend reacts. If its good coming out shouldn't be a problem if not then coming out may not be the best idea. Also I'm a big MTG fan too its cool to see that there are more on the site.
do you know what his views are on the subject of LGBT, in general or his own opinion about it? i'd say hold off a bit if you honestly don't know about it. if you want to come out to him, you should be able to get a better understanding first. Mormons are more strict in their beliefs then what catholics or christians "normally" believe, but they fall under the same category as they all believe in the bible. there might be a chance that he could over react if he strongly believes in it. you can work a conversation through and get a grasp of an idea about what he thinks about it. the families in Prayer for Bobby were christians, haha.(that's the least of your concern though )
It sounds like he's a not a super strict Mormon if he's into Magic. Maybe ask him a couple of questions about what he believes in as a Mormon. That way you can throw in some placebo questions as well. "What happens after we die?", "What's your thoughts on gay marriage?", "Where did The Book of Mormons come from?", etc. That way it won't feel out of place and really obvious.
Well we do have a few gay people at our school but he never talks to them or bats an eye towards them. We never talked about our beliefs or our views on LGBT people as well. Ill try it on Monday when we get back to school. He did show me a gay photo of some gay guy in a pink suit saying "you came to the wrong neighbourhood, sweetie" and i was like "uggh!" Because i had to act like i was horrified. But that was like the only photo related to a LGTB thingy. But it was also for humour as well.
Don't assume that the Mormon thing makes it a necessary deal breaker. I grew up Mormon. My family are very active Mormons and they were very supportive. I regularly visit them in Salt Lake, have attended large gatherings where almost everyone was Mormon openly with my partner and never had any issues.
IIRC the family in "Prayers for Bobby" was Catholic (Christians). You may be thinking about "Latter Days", where one of lead characters was a Mormon.
I also grew up Mormon. There are many who are more enlightened and accepting today, especially the younger generation. Still you should proceed with caution. Don't do it until it feels right. But when you do, you will be teaching him that the myths and stereotypes of LGBTQ people are not true. And then he will have the chance to grow and educate himself and perhaps help to change the whole Mormon communities' thoughts and biases and become an advocate for gay people. Many gay Mormon people suffer because of ignorance. The more people who come out and normalize the gay community the better. It helps everyone. Good Luck!
Thanks everyone. I actually might talk to him about it this week during school or on our writers group trip.
I agree with AsheTheHuman dude. I think subtly questioning and showing interest in what his beliefs are, is the best way for you to get some idea of his reaction before coming out completely. What I would say is that in my knowledge (and I'm not religious, just interested in religions) the Mormon church focuses mostly on the New Testament? This would actually increase their likelihood of being accepting and supportive compared to a lot of other faiths. The other thing I would say is that I have met mormons who say that humans are not superior enough to judge anyone - only God can judge when the time comes and only God knows what is right and wrong - so to discourage others from finding faith because of something humans assume - would be a loss to the church and a contradiction to their mission of spreading his word. It might also be that your friend disagrees with it, but only because he has never encountered the issue. I think that a lot of the time, with hundreds of different issues and matters and morals - will adopt a pre-set stance on something until it affects them directly. The same way some people will make jokes about an issue or not get involved or show interest in an issue until either they, or someone they care about experiences it. Then the stance will hesitate and be questioned and more than likely change. When you come out to him, he may just need time to mull it over and question himself about what he truly does believe. And this is the same reaction you expect could occur when coming out to anyone for the first time. Please let us know how it goes!!! and goodluck xx
