Is he hitting her

Well, basically, if he actually is hitting her, call the police and let them take care of it. Other than that, I can't really come up with anything.

 

Talk to your mum and tell her that you are worried about her, don't go jumping to conclusions and certainly don't call the cops. Your mum is an adult and can make her own decisions, she won't thank you for bringing in the police because you think there might be the possibility that her b/f MAY have hit her.

 

Yeah, I would try and gently talk to your Mum. Explain about the overheard comment and ask if he has hit her.

 

Hey man, I'm in agreement with Louise.. You need to have a talk with your mum and express your concerns. I know that this could be somewhat difficult given the circumstances, but in the end, whatever the case is, I'm sure she'll be grateful that you care.

Calling the cops may be tempting, but unless you're actually witnessing him being violent towards her it's definitely not a great idea.

 

my mum went through an abusive relationship that she stayed in for like 10 years, it really messes up everyone those situations, kids included. i used to just stay quiet and ignore it when i was younger, but as i got older and realised it was wrong, id intervene. i remember one night it was really bad after they'd been out, and i went down, screamed some and then told him i was calling the police if he didnt get out. he left. my mum didnt appreciate it, she was drunk, and she wanted him to come back, i had to physically take her to bed and she sobbed, and i stayed incase she got up and called him or let him in. god thankgod those days are gone. she eventually left him, and after some idiot she went out with after, shes now with a really gentle nice guy.

however, my advice is NOT to intervene. never. unless you think you can handle it. and you probably cant, dont, its dangerous. just call the cops if you actually hear that something dangerous is happening. my mums b/f was expolsive with his temper and anger towards her (he even hit her while she was pregnant), but never to me or my sisters, he always cooled down if id come down and cause a scene. i know many men whom physically abuse their other halves though can be way more unpredictable, and they could easily turn on you. i never cared about that, cause 1) i didnt believe he would, and i wasnt scared of him, just scared for my mum and 2) the instinct to protect those you love from been hurt totally wipes away you rationalisation, for me at least.

however if you havent heard anything, then chances are if he does hit her, he does it when no-ones around, if he is.

do try talking to your mum, however, be prepared for your mum to deny point blank shes ever been hit by him, and brush your concerns aside even if she is been abused (and his comment you overheard suggests he might). my mum used to do that, even when i knew he had hit her, she'd deny it, and on the times id intervene, she'd act like it was blown out of proportion the next day, and id hear her lie to friends aswell....they want to pretend everything is ok, because they feel shame or/and fear of the consequences.

 

I agree, talk to your mom.

But like ausdtc said, dont' call the cops unless you've actually witnessed it because one, he won't get in trouble and two, there's a possiblity that you might get in trouble for making a 'false' report.

Unless you actually see it happening, there's not much that can be done, because you're not even sure if he's actually hitting her. You just heard him say something. Keep a close eye on the boyfriend and tell your mom that you're there for her.

 

You should have both you and sister talk to your mom. If she hears it from BOTH of you then your concern might be more reinforced to her. I would hold off for now in calling the cops. If you feel that she or you are in danger then call.