:smilewave hiya! I posted a thread under lizzieedwards something something a little while back, but now I can't remember the password so if anyone replied I'm sorry! So I have know since I was very little that I liked girls, and it never really fased me, it's only recently I have realised that I should maybe identify as something. It doesn't bother me at all, and most of my family I know would be totally cool with it if I came out. The only problem is that I'm not sure what I should identify as :help: like I love absolutely very part of girls, literally everything, personalitys, characteristics, body.. Other things :icon_redf but I only like boys personalities, and (it sounds weird) their faces. I can't work out if this is attraction or just wanting to be freinds, as I was only freinds with boys for most of my life so far. I know in the future I only want to be with a girl, and penises are super gross, I really never want to be with a guy (sorry guys, believe me your not missing anything here) Sooooo I guess I'm trying to say, am I still a lesbian if I think guys can be cute? Woah that was longer than I expected.... (!) thanks! I have also pressed post a poll but I don't know what it does so sorry if I messed stuff up :eusa_doh:
remember that you don't have to label yourself but having read what you've said I'd say you've got a maybe 90ish% attraction towards women and 10ish to dudes. ---------- Post added 8th Sep 2014 at 08:46 PM ---------- or maybe 95 to 5
That seems about exactly right actually, thank you xx I still feel like I should label tho it's stupid I know x but thank you!
I think you're a lesbian who feels aesthetic attraction to men because this is extremely common for lesbians to begin with, and what makes us lesbian is lack of sexual attraction. Of course if you find a guy you'd like to be with, you could say bi too, but I don't think finding guys cute means anything
I'm 100% lesbian, but I can still notice when someone's a good looking (cute) guy with an awesome personality. I prefer guys as friends too. Its basically the same as a straight girl thinking another girl is "hot" - isn't necessarily an attraction or sexual thing. Unless it is. Only you can know what feelings you associate with spotting a cute boy ! Labels are over rated in some ways as sexuality can't be defined for everyone as "gay" "straight" "bi" "lesbian" etc. As mentioned in the responses you've got - some people are attracted in percentages to genders. Some are 100%. But i think by saying you only like boys' personalities and faces, means it's probably not "sexual attraction"
If you don't want to sleep with guys I think your lesbian , lesbians don't have sexual attraction to guys meaning they don't have the sexual desire to sleep with them . If you have sexual desire to sleep with guys then your bisexual .
I agree with stocking if you only want relationships with girls your a lesbian but that's for you to decide for yourself. You can just be friends with boys.
I've actually been asking myself the same exact question. I like how guys look and everything (from the waist up) but i just dont like penises. But I also love everything about women. I can't exactly give you any advice because , well, I'm going through it too but maybe sharing my experience on it might shed some light for you. one thing my therapist mentioned when i told him really made me think. "Penises aren't just some separate creature of their own. They are a part of a person who has their own personality and feelings." For me I found that I would look at a guy that I thought was cute and literally dismiss it with the thought, "but he has a penis so it will never work." And with that mindset I realized I was basing so much on genetalia but not on anything else. So now I'm left to wonder am I still a lesbian or is something else going on.
^ It's true what your therapist has said. Penises are attached to a person with a personality and feelings. But the same goes when you put that statement in reverse. There is a penis attached to that person with a personality and feelings. If you think logically about it - relationships are friendships with commitment and sex! If you entered a relationship with a guy (yes sex can be seen as a "small part" of relationships) but they are a part. If you can't find sex with a man attractive or arousing then being more than close friends is going to be an issue. Not only will it affect you - but it will affect the guy. And his feelings that are attached to that penis. Try imagine being with someone who loves your personality and cares about you but when it comes to sleeping with you they cannot get turned on, do not find you sexy, don't want to touch or go near your lady bits and can't enjoy that side of your relationship.... how would that make you feel? My best friend is a guy and I would say I am greatly attracted to his personality and I care a lot about his feelings - but I could never ever be sexually attracted to him. That is why it is friendship. Hope this helps.
I've thought about that. I realize my previous post may have come across as insensitive- especially with the way my therapist worded that sentence about men, but, I know I can connect in a non romantic way with a guy but there's no way to know without getting to know a guy if I can romantically, and If I wind up genuinely liking someone and they like me it would be an intimately awkward road to go down while I try and sort out my feelings. I think it would have to be someone I trusted enough that cared enough to help me figure things out but if they don't work out because our wants don't match it will end up being a very one sided relationship in the physical sense and I wouldn't want to do that to someone. Also I've been down that road. I was in love with my best friend and she finally decided to date me thinking she was bi but broke up with me saying she was straight. I was heartbroken. So its like, do I dismiss this and go on finding men attractive but do nothing about it and continue to identify as a lesbian (Which I've done for 8 years) and let it go? Or do I risk hurting someone, maybe even myself as well to see if I'm on to something?
