im so scaerd of being gay here this week i finally admitted it to myself but i dont wanna be I WANNA BE NORMAL i the town where i live u get beat up for being gay or unperfect and i no im never gonna be abel to come out NEVER it feels so horrible though haveing this botteld up inside ofe me but yet i no im not gonna be happy without loving a guy WHAT DO I DO BEFORE I DO FINALLY JUMP??? HELP ME PLZ
so, first off: dont jump. be it literal or metiphorical, dont. second, try theatre. it sounds kinda stupid, but try it. there are amazing people that you can meet that you can trust. you can tell the --for lack of a better word-- bitches, from the people that you can actually trust. it may not be your thing, but its a start. im very tired right now, and my dear amy-ness is about dead, s ill write more in the morning. itll also be more coherent.
You are 16 years old. If you can hang on a couple more years, you can move from the place you live now. You don't say where you live but my son came out in a really conservative cowboy town where people had been beaten up for being gay too. Everything went fine. Just respect other people but most of all respect yourself by being who you are. Don't erase your queer future! (http://www.donteraseyourqueerfuture.org/)
As said; you're young. Very young. You have a lot to learn about yourself, the world and the people around you. Making such a rash decision now would surely seem foolish to you in 5 years. If you don't feel safe and comfortable in coming out then don't. No one ever said you have to be open to everyone. You can chose and control (to an extent) who know's what about you. Fall in love, get your heart broken, do it again, experience a working relationship, experience true homophobia, feel pride in who you are and enjoy being that person. It will all happen eventually. Anyway, my advise. Find a nice tiny bridge into a gentle river that you know and can swim in. Pretend it's going to be your last jump and jump. It's what I did. Felt much better after it, the urge to jump off a bridge disappeard. Although the bridge I jumped from was only about a foot above the water, but in my head is was 1000. The water was cold, but that helped.
Hi there! First off, congrats on coming out to yourself! You have taken the first major step. It can be scary at first because we don't know what the future holds for us. Now that you have admitted it to yourself, slowly you will start wanting to tell others including your friends and family. It is a process that will take time but you will get there. If you go at it slow and follow what feels right for you, you should be fine. Don't feel too bad about having it inside of you. Yes it can be difficult but you also have to think about your own interests and safety. Given the environment in which you live, you might have to take it really slow. But as Becky mentioned, things can turn out to be just fine. That said, take your time, think about your safety. Only come out to the people you know you can trust and will accept/support you for who you are. Be assured that you are normal! We don't chose our sexual orientation. For some of us it takes longer to come to grips/terms with it but somewhere down the road you will realize that being gay does not prevent you from doing anything. Your sexual orientation is only a small part of you. As it was said above you are 16. You might be able to move away in a couple of years to a place that might be more accepting. Hang in there and when you get the opportunity to move, look into that. If you find it a bit difficult to deal with or feel that you need to talk with someone, you could try talking to a school counselor. I think that this could help you in many ways. Maybe something to think about. I hope this helps!
Don't Jump! Seriously though, when you first admit to yourself that you are gay it can be a very scary thing and you can feel hopeless and like you will never be able to be open about who you are and that everybody would abandon you if they knew but that is not true. Eventually you'll feel comfortable enough to start to think about coming out and you will eventually find the right time to come out and feel it is right. I would never suggest that you come out to people you don't trust. As far as the town you live in, You only have 2 years until you are 18 so I would try to get a job if I were you and save as much money as you can and get out of that town if it makes you uncomfortable. Good luck with everything! Sam
As everyone has said dont jump. Being gay is, at first very difficult but I can say that it gets alot easier with time. Also if you can find one open minded person who you are almost certain will accept you and you can trust them then i'd strongly recomend coming out to them, it's surprising what coming out to one person does it feels so much better almost instantly, but DON'T DO THAT UNTIL YOU FEEL READY, that's important. Good luck, hang on and know that here, we all support you, Dean
You don't have to jump. Well, accepting yourself is a daunting task, but it'll be okay with time later. Try to talk to someone you can trust, or the school's counsellor. They can help you with that.
Never is a very, very, very, very long time, you know. And in the grand scheme of things, you've been gay for a very short time. You certainly don't need to come out now. I wouldn't suggest doing that until you're ready to - and you clearly aren't. But don't assume that because you aren't ready now that you'll never be! Don't assume that you'll live in the same town your entire life. There are LOTS of places where you can be comfortable being gay - even if you don't think you could be in your home town. So just hang around here in EC. You can be 'out' here as much as you want. In fact, you could say that being out in EC is very 'in'. (!)
