All right, I'll just jump right in. Pretty sure my current situation is similar to that of many people who have discovered their own sexuality, so I'll just get straight to it. I've grown up with VERY conservative Christian parents, who insisted on homeschooling me, sheltered me a lot through most of my young adult years and early teens. Never really talked about sex or sexuality, except occasionally in a derogatory, joking manner. When I was 15 or 16, I had a friend who I was incredibly attracted to. One time he spent the night over at my house (along with other friends). He sort of came on to me, I was uncomfortable and confused, so I turned him down. He was sort of crushed, but we both dismissed it and never discussed it again. My attraction to him grew, though, and I tried to get closer to him, but he made it clear he was no longer interested in being a friend or a FWB. It's been three years, I've been watching gay porn pretty consistently for almost a year now. At first I thought it was just a phase, and I came up with all sorts of excuses for why I'd be watching it - pretty typical reaction, I guess. But I started noticing I'd get a hard on whenever I'd see a hot guy, and I began watching gay porn even more often (and stopped watching straight/lesbian porn completely, for a while). It took me a while to admit it to myself, but I realized there was no avoiding the fact that I'm bisexual. I have no problem with this; I've slowly grown apart from my parents, and we're now polar opposites in political views (and just about anything). They've been extremely judgemental of my life choices since I've told them I was (*gasp*) not conservative, and that I no longer felt comfortable at church. So telling them I'm bisexual would horrify them, no doubt. I've been able to cone out to a few supportive friends - several of whom are bisexual themselves - but most are people I've met through the Internet, or are going through similar situations. It's hard to meet other bisexual guys in Alabama, too, especially when you've been forced to meet most friends through church or similar places your whole life. For those who have similar backgrounds, or having, similar, ongoing issues: do you have any advice? Should I eventually come out to my family? Currently I plan to transfer out of state for college next year, so I think it may be best if I wait until I'm gons, and I've settled in. And any advice on how to meet other guys (esp. to those that have lived in Birmingham or other southern cities). I know that's a TON of information, so I'll just stop there. Thanks to you guys, in advance, and I'm glad to now officially be a part of this forum. (!):eusa_danc
Come out when your ready. I know thats not as helpful as uou probably want but it all matters if it is the right time or not. Sooner or later its gonna pop up in a conversation or its gonna come out like word vomit. If they are not so accepting of your sexuality then be cautious of possible unexpected feelings. I did my confession in a letter, its way easier then letting it all just spill out of your mouth. Good Luck
As a person who grew up in Birmingham (a long time ago) I think your plan to come out AFTER you are at college makes a lot of sense. The people of my generation are still mostly obsessed with church and rigid conservative philosophies, and think they are hearing the truth when they listen to Fox "News". Most of us who left there for college ended up being more rational about life and people; sounds like you have a good start already. My only advice is to go to a school in a state which has already passed gay marriage laws; it means that the majority of the public there will not think you are sicko because you are gay, and the students you will meet are likely to be even more accepting of you as just another guy. You may even be able to find a satisfactory school in a state with Republicans in control of everything, but the odds are significantly not in your favor, particularly if you decide to stay there and work there, where your job might be at risk if you are "out". There are a lot of better places to live than the "Bible Belt", and meet other gay men who are out in the open and thus easier to find.
