Heres abit of the background I have a crush on a girl for two years. We had been in the same school all our life and its an girls school. Lesbian relationships doesn't really matter here. We are both 15 now and we used to playful fake fights all the time and we had a lot of physical contact. I see it as flirting and in my friend's point of view its flirting too, but I'm not sure whether it is to her. She had done couple actions to me before like locking her arms with mine, lean on my shoulder, gave me a back hug. We even have the same jansport bag which she copied me, and my friend often teases us as having couple bags. Her actions to me made me think that she had a good impression of me. I began to crush on her harder. I told my classmates I have an eyecandy, after hiding it for two years, they recently found out who, thanks to my carelessness. My crush kept bugging me to find out who, but once she found out she avoided me. Our flirting stopped. Hurts alot. Every free time our class had, it would be spent flirting with her as she always starts it. Now, seeing her play with another girl makes me darn jealous. I don't even know if she's interested in girls. But it seems to me she does. But now I think writing a letter to her might be the best choice, although things will definetely get awkward between us. But if I don't do that, those feelings will be trapping me. So here's my letter: Hey____, I wrote this letter to tell you how I feel. I hope that you can understand what I'm going through now. I had been crushing on you for two years. Please don't freak out. And by crush I mean I fell for you hard. I tell people its just an eyecandy, and yes, you're suspicions are right. I do ec you. But the truth is, its more than that. It is to cover up for the word crush as I cant handle my own lgbt issues. This really sucks. I don't even know if you're straight. This year you became closer to me. From January to August I had been keeping track of every contact or conversations we had. I wrote it down. I thought you might even start to like me, based on those playful fights we had everytime we went to the toilet. I wish I had the guts to tell you how I feel. Once you found out that I ec you you became distant towards me. It had been more than a month since I play fights with you and get close to you. I missed that alot. I hated myself for being a lesbian. I can't help it too. I had troubles coming out to my parents and friends. It really hurts. Its okay if you don't accept me. I just hope that you don't feel distant towards me anymore and I just hope that things will be back to normal again. ---------- Post added 5th Oct 2014 at 03:41 PM ---------- Any advices or things I should add? Comments please
It sounds okay to me, but you might just be revealing a little too much of how you feel about her.. I probably would leave it with that you have a crush on her perhaps and then if she wants to talk to you after she has read it, it could be something you wanna add later on.. I don't think you wanna bare your heart and soul too much to her in this letter. I would also avoid the part about tracking all the things you did and keeping it written down, she might see that as a bit too awkward. Also maybe add that you understand if she needs time to process it all as well and that you will let her take that time to sort out her own feelings as well. You don't know how she feels yet or what is going on in her life.. She might have parents and family who aren't supportive of the LGBT community, so just make sure she knows that you will be supportive of her and give her as much time as she needs to process it all and that you apologize if any of this makes her feel awkward or feel uncomfortable but it is something you just needed to let her know about now cause you need to know for yourself so you know where you stand and if you need to let go and move on.
I edited my letter thank you blossom85, and mariaaa. Hey, I wrote this letter to tell you how I feel. I hope that you can understand what I'm going through now. I had been crushing on you for two years. Please don't freak out. And by crush I mean I fell for you hard. I tell people its just an eyecandy, and yes, you're suspicions are right. I do ec you. But the truth is, its more than that. It is to cover up for the word crush as I cant handle my own lgbt issues. This really sucks. I don't even know if you're straight. This year you became closer to me. Play fighting along the corridor, toilet, classrooms. I thought you might even start to like me. Turns out that I was wrong. I wish I had the guts to tell you how I feel. Once you found out that I like you you became distant towards me. It had been more than a month since I play fights with you and get close to you. I missed that alot. I hated myself for being a lesbian. I can't help it too. I had troubles coming out to my parents and friends. It really hurts. Its okay if you don't accept me. I just hope that you don't feel distant towards me anymore and I just hope that things will be back to normal again. I know this letter is very sudden. I will give you time and to slowly process all of these. I don't know what is going on in your life, but just know that whenever you feel lonely, or just need someone to talk to, remember that I will be here for you. Always. I apologize for making things awkward for both of us. I'm sorry, I don't have the guts to talk to you about this face to face, but this is something that I have to let you know. So that I know for myself where I stand and if I needed to let you go and move on. Is this okay? Any things to add on? ---------- Post added 6th Oct 2014 at 05:25 PM ---------- Or any comments out there..
Hey Hun, I noticed you left the bit at the top there about it being more then a crush and falling hard for her, I have taken out things and added things to show you how I would word it.. It is up to you if you wish to use this version or not. Dear... (Then her name) I wrote this letter to tell you how I feel. I hope that you can understand what I'm going through now. I have had a crush on you for two years. I hope this doesn't make you feel awkward as I am unsure how you really feel. This year we became closer to each other, Play fighting along the corridor, toilet, and classrooms. I thought you might even start to like me however it seems I might be mistaken. I wish I had the guts to tell you how I felt earlier, however once you found out that I like you from others, you seem to have become distant towards me. It has been more than a month since our play fights and us being close like we used to. I miss that a lot. I have had troubles coming out to my parents and friends as a lesbian and it has really made me feel alone at times and hurt. It is okay if you don't accept me, I just hope that things came become back to normal again and we can go back to being friends again. I also know this letter has come out of the blue, and I will give you time to slowly process all of this. I am unsure of what is going on in your life at the moment but just know that whenever you feel lonely, or just need someone to talk to, remember that I will be here for you as a friend always. I apologize for making things awkward for both of us. I'm sorry that I don't have the guts to talk to you about this face to face, but this is something that I have to let you know, mainly so that I know for myself where I stand, and where you stand, and so I know if I need to let go of this crush and move on.
