Hi in the other day I was having lunch with my grandma and one thing lead to another and we started to talk about homosexuality. I know she's not the most supportive person ever in that matter but at least she tolerates it( at least that's what she says ). But either way, we were talking and she started to talk about bisexuality and she said some pretty awful things, it got to the point that I closed myself in the bathroom and just cried. Right now I'm confused I don't know what exactly I am but one thing is for sure I'm not straight. Only my emidiate family knows that I'm "bisexual" or at least that's what I think I am and that's what I identify as. I don't know how to tell her that supposedly I'm and I quote : "Bisexual, confused, perverted minded and promiscuous people who would be better off if they didn't existed." I don't think I will be telling her anytime soon about this part of me, at least not until I'm almost 100 % sure and confident about my sexual identity, but even so can someone help me find a way to till then soften things a little bit ?
I'm sorry justbehappy, that sounds really rough. Unfortunately a lot of people think like your grandma. One of my best friends is bi, and a lot of times, bi people are given a hard time in the LGBT community too. It's disappointing. First off, take your time figuring out who you are, there's no rush. You don't even have to label yourself if you don't want to. As long as you're happy and comfortable, that's all that matters. If a label makes you feel more comfortable, that's okay. Second, it sounds like you have a pretty good relationship with your grandma. I bet if there's one person on the planet that can help her understand what being bi really means, it's you. Her view of bisexuals is wrong and that's why she doesn't like them. If she knew what being bi really meant, she wouldn't feel the way she does. Unfortunately, that leaves you to explain it to her and that might not be an easy thing to get out. I'd like to think that if she knew her grand daughter was bi, she would try to understand and she wouldn't have said such hateful things. I'm not sure if that's much help, but I've only got one more thing and that's a hug (*hug*).
That's horrible, I'm really sorry. I don't understand why some people can tolerate gays but say awful things about bisexuals. it's terrible, and I don't even understand why It's only them since gays have a stereotype of being promiscuous too
Sometimes it just feels good to talk to people who understand and be heard so thanks and I will take that advise and so the hug. :icon_wink
justbehappy, Sorry this so bad for you . I do have something to add to the others coments . You have to also look at this your grandma is from a different time back when things were a lot different some things that are aceptable today were not then . I am not trying to make excuses for her but give you another spin on what has happened .I hope this helps . I hope you can work threw this with her and all will be well just take your time and be your self and you will do GREAT!!!
This might be a little hard to hear but I don't think you should come out to your grandmother,at least until you have a strong support system. It might be difficult to hold it in,believe me, but if you are at the point where it would break you if you got a negative reaction from her,you should wait. In my opinion,only when you are secure in your sexuality and what she says wouldn't affect the way you think of yourself as much,then you should. You should also take into account though that she might be biphobic,until she realizes that someone that she loves and is close to is bisexual,that could change her entire view of bisexuals! Always remember that if she isn't accepting of you that is isn't your fault and that you have a great support system her e on empty closets. I hope you figure out who you are! Don't feel rushed to come out,come out when you are ready!
