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Coming out to my best friend went wrong

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by chronichomo, Oct 11, 2014.

  1. chronichomo

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    Is my ex bestfriend a closet case/Coming out to my best friend went wrong

    Im a 18 year old gay male and im really confused rn. my best friend is also who i am in love with would always do gay things the whole time i knew him. like really questionable things. like send me nudes "as a joke" and sent me a penis pic when he was drunk and asked for one of mine. he was drunk so i never really cared but recently he was acting really gay hard like all out text convos had really gay things said on them. hes also told me to come out of the closet before as a joke and called me his gay best friend and he acted like he knew i wasnt straight . hes also had like 2 girlfriends that both didnt last to long and had a girl he would hook up with but never had sex with any of them. but he also claims to be homophobic but i never believed it so when i came out as bi(wasnt ready to come out as gay)he totally turned me down as his friend and doesnt want to talk to me he said he cant be friends with me and acted like he didnt know i was gay or bi and we got into a fight and i called him a closet case and he got really mad over that. the only good thing is that he kept it a secret and hasnt told anybody my sexuality
     
    #1 chronichomo, Oct 11, 2014
    Last edited: Oct 11, 2014
  2. Yossarian

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    You are probably better off without him in your life for now; maybe he will figure himself out as he gets older and accepts whatever sexuality is natural for him.
     
  3. OnTheHighway

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    Use this as a learning experience. Agreed you should simply move on. Don't look back and don't second guess it.
     
  4. lb41974

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    It could be that he is also gay and now that you have come out it leaves him all alone "in the closet" and that scares him ,but I don't think he was a very good friend if that is the way he treats you ! I would go on and not look back you never know one day he may decide to try and get back into your life and if he does I would take a good amount of time and think if you should or not .
     
  5. Blossom85

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    I am sorry it didn't go well for you, I would worry about a persons true intentions as a friend if they can't seem to just be accepting of who their friend is.. They don't need to understand it or praise it, however it think a real friend will support you through and through.. It could be that he just needs time to process and accept it. He may be gay, he may not be, but that is something that you can't dwell on. You just need to keep on going and live your life as you wish. I agree with the others, don't look back and just keep looking towards the future.
     
  6. clovis

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    some people are put in our lives to test us and push us out of our comfort zone... and I think that's this guys purpose... take it for what it is... and move on. learn from it.
     
  7. DarkestDream

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    Your friend is dealing with his own insecurities, his own self image and sexuality, from what it sounds like. You trusted the sincerity of that, and it most likely freaked him out when you were comfortable in yourself enough to admit it to him. His cruel behavior is an attempt to cover all this up. Hold your head high, and move forward. *HUGS* (*hug*)
     
  8. person57

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    Your friend is an idiot. You don't need him and you're better off without him. You don't deserve to have that ignorant bitch-face as a friend. You deserve someone better. Keep your head up and stay positive. You'll find better friends that will accept you and support you :slight_smile:. (*hug*)