hey, nemo here. this is my first post. i feel a little stupid 'cause i don't really want to take my recent questioning seriously. just seems like an unnecessary complication in an otherwise fairly good life. i'm really not unhappy, just confused. so i'm definitely attracted to men, but recently i've noticed a few women slip in as well. this isn't really a problem for me - i honestly don't feel a need to know what label i fall under or anything. i'm happy taking each crush as it comes (and goes). however, i have a few questions: 1) can one's orientation change so late? was under the impression i would have known about it earlier. i'm okay with it just being a phase, but maybe it's more than that? 2) do i tell people? i mean, at the moment i'm not making a secret of it to my close friends that i'm sometimes attracted to girls, but say i'm about to share a room with someone. i mean i feel like they should be aware that i'm not entirely straight before they decide to share a bed with me etc. especially considering i have a number of more conservative friends. at the same time i don't want to feel obligated to tell every new aqcuaintance (so official. especially if it turns out to be a phase). and i'd die a little inside if they started treating me like i might spontaneously combust at the sight of a boob - i still have a clear separation of people into 'just friends' and 'potentials', the divider just isn't gender. i'm also finnish. for those of you unfamiliar with the culture: nudity isn't inherently sexual in any way. anyhow, these are my confusions. i'd appreciate opinions and/advice. oh and here's a (!) - how cute isn't that? love it.
Hi nemo. First off - 19? Late? Take a look around here some more. There's a whole section dedicated to late in life questioners, etc. 30, 40, 50... So, pish, you've got ages to go. As for telling people with whom you might share a bed, unless you grope in your sleep the way you might be a sleep-kicker, I wouldn't bother. Although if that happens, you'd simply need to apologize. Oops. Anyways, welcome to EC! Ask away. I've found it most helpful here.
You're not the only one. You might have a look at this thread, and similar ones : http://emptyclosets.com/forum/sexua.../143948-has-never-happened-before-14.html#267 and at this: Am I Gay, Lesbian, Bisexual, or Transgender? I'd say take your time... explore your feelings... and there is sexual and romantic attraction... have a cute banana, too (!)
thanks! it really sorts your thoughts out just putting them in writing. haha, i am thankfully not a sleep-groper. i think i'll be alright. i suppose that i simply have to take each individual decision to tell someone as its own wee situation instead of establishing some sort of 'policy' for myself. stay cool!
