this is my first post here...woo...anyway, people probably see this all the time, but how does one come out? I know that my parents are very accepting of the LGBTQ community (im bisexual) but i still feel so nervous i want to throw up every time I try to tell my mom. I texted one of my best friends asking him about it, and it lifted some weight off of my shoulders, but I feel like it's important for other people to know, and I dont want to live in fear and i want to be proud of myself. thanks for any help
There really is no specific method of coming out. Just telling someone like "I've thought about this for a while now and have decided to tell you that I'm bisexual," should do but it's not about HOW you come out it's about gaining the CONFIDENCE to come out. If you don't feel ready to come out then simply don't. You don't have to rush it. You have all the time in the world.
thanks last time i told my mom/dad about something big it took me a while to build up the confidence, so ive just gotta be ready i guess..thanks again
Hi there! Welcome to Empty Closets. Congratulations on your first coming out. As it was mentioned there is no specific way to come out. It really depends on what you feel comfortable with. Some will come out in person, while others will write a letter. Coming out to parents is sometimes not an easy step to take. But the great thing is that you have started thinking about it, and are readying yourself for it. What could help is writing the words out you want to say to your mom. That could help you to organize your thoughts, and it could even provide you with a backup - should you decide that you would feel more comfortable with giving a letter. The other thing that could help is perhaps trying to come out to one or two more friends, so to keep building up your confidence and to feel ready for your parents to know.
I have to agree that there is no generic way to come out , I do know that you will come out when you are ready and you feel that the time is right . I am sorry that you are having this hard of a time with telling them . I was forced to come out and I hated it .I only wish I had a miracle answer for you but I do not . I wish you all the best of luck !!!! please let us know if you are able to come out and what happens .
Thanks :icon_bigg i did write out stuff before when I wanted to tell my mom about dealing with depression, and it helped, so ill see what i can do in this case. ---------- Post added 15th Nov 2014 at 02:44 PM ---------- Well, not everything has one right answer :s but thank you for the support, and i hope stuff is working out for you!
People do it in different ways. I would just sit your parents down and tell them, you don't have to make it like a big deal BUT it is a part of who you are and I think telling close people like your parents through a text or social media might offend them...like they might feel you don't trust them enough to tell them face-to-face? (or it might not...but it's not very personal) Anyway, yeah, it is totally nerve-wracking *pat pat*. But I tell you what, you will feel so much relief once you've got it off your chest. Also, when you tell your parents or anyone else, make sure they're not preoccupied (ie. watching tv, in the middle of a conversation, about to go somewhere). Just cause having to repeat yourself is kind of painful Good luck!
Thanks! the *pat pat* part made me laugh, by the way :lol: But yeah, I want to make sure that it's personal, so ill just build up my confidence and make sure my mom isnt watching her reality TV shows when i tell her lol
I Do know what you mean.. I was thinking of this whole formal thing to say to my mum and it ended up being something simple that I brought up after an Aunty asked the night before if my friend (who is a girl and with a girl) assumed I was gay cause she introduced me to this other girl on my wall.. I had been trying to figure out the perfect time to talk to mum and it was gonna be this big conversation and it ended up being just referring the conversation we had the night before and saying.. "Well she (my friend) wasn't totally wrong cause I do like guys and girls". My mum kinda nodded and she yeah and then nothing else was said.. I was worried that wasn't enough, but everyone here said that was fine and if she wanted to talk to me, she would.. Bottom line anyway, it doesn't need to be anything formal or big. I am glad though I didn't mention the word bisexual to her cause I am now identifying as pansexual and actually saying bisexual is what I originally wanted to mention.
that sounds a lot better than some ping pong type of conversation where it's just sort of going back and forth until stuff is worked out...so i guess it'll just be a sort of spur of the moment thing, because last time i told her something that was a big deal, she just asked me what was wrong and i told her thanks again!
