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Are you "out" in your professional life?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by mapleluv, Dec 7, 2014.

  1. mapleluv

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    I'm mostly just curious to hear about other people's experiences on this topic. What kind of work you do, whether or not you're out at work (& why), & any negative or positive experiences you've had associated with this topic.
     
  2. Candace

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    I'm out to some of my coworkers. One of my friends (well, the guy who got me my job in the first place), is (obviously) gay and out to everyone. So I just said "hey, so am I". No one at work has a problem with it, but it's not like I talk about it. They're coworkers, and I haven't gotten to know them to a point where I would feel okay discussing stuff like that with them.
     
  3. sldanlm

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    Hell no! When I first started working for my current employer, the owners weren't homophobic. They later sold the company to some people that make the Duck Dynasty elder look moderate. They claim to be affiliated with a church, but it's a business I work for, not a church. They put out a new employee manual that basically states that they are a Christian owned business, and that while they don't require employees to be Christians, they expect employees to not say or do anything publically that conflicts with traditional Judeo Christian values, as employee public behavior reflects on the company as well. (morals clause) They've also stated in a company meeting that they've hired a service that checks employees Facebook postings, public online postings, etc. They've hinted verbally that you can be fired for even publicly supporting gay rights, whether or not you are gay.

    I've been told that this might be technically legal where I live. The only reason I'm still working there is I would like to avoid a court battle and looking for another job right now. Hopefully I'll be moving and quitting in the near future anyway.
     
  4. OGS

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    I am out at work. I work for a major financial services company in a sales-type roll. I am the only out person I know of in my area, not just in my office but in the district and the market. Frankly it's the sort of job where there aren't even a lot of women let alone LBGT people. But, frankly there hasn't been any negative fallout. My company insures my partner and even pays me a little bit extra to compensate for how their portion of his insurance is considered taxable by the US government in a way that it would not be if we were married. All my coworkers know my partner and when we have events where spouses attend he attends. Sometimes I think some of my coworkers like him better than they do me.:lol: I have always tended to assume people will be alright with things and even in this old boys club people have tended to go along.
     
  5. Rice

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    I'm out to a couple of people at work. It wouldn't be a problem if they knew either, so that's great to know.

    In my last place, I think two guys either guessed or were told by someone and they made a couple of homophobic comments.
     
  6. SemiCharmedLife

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    I'm a grad student. All the other students in my program know. Some of the faculty and other supervisors I've worked with know as well. Everyone's been great about it.
     
  7. Bloodwalker

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    My workplace is severely homophobic. Sadly, that's what most of the society is like where I'm from. Insulting, vulgar homophobic jokes are the norm, as well as slurs and public statements even about how my coworkers would disown their own children if they "turn out to be gay". So, I'm in the closet there and the doors are firmly shut.
     
  8. Panthon13

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    No, I am not.
    I joked around a few times about being gay and wanting to find a good guy, and that was right after breaking up with my girlfriend and accepting that I was gay. The conversation basically went like this:
    "Hey, well now I can find someone good for me."
    "Exactly! Good for you for getting away from something so toxic!"
    "Yeah! Maybe I'll end up with a guy!"
    "Oh noooo, you don't want to do that."

    They literally went from laughing and encouragement to straight up rejection. Luckily I played it like it was a joke. This happened with at least 8 people I talked to. I was trying to get a feel for how they would react if they all knew I was gay, because everyone at my job really likes me and looks up to me.

    And it's sad because I work at a liberal school who supports and encourages their minorities. Maybe that's all just on the outside.

    Not to discourage any of you from opening up to your workplace. I will one day, perhaps when I'm with someone who can help ease the stress from the impending criticism that will result.
     
  9. OnTheHighway

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    I am out to everyone at my company. When I came out, it was a massive event where I worked and helped cause the entire company's benefits to be updated to include LGBT rights and benefits. I have not heard of any issues having come out, and no one has approached me directly with any issues.
     
  10. mangotree

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    I just assume that everyone knows.
    I talk openly and candidly about my relationships, friendships, dating and social life.
    I work as a video editor, but started with the company in their callcentre and I'm still close with old colleagues.

    Everyone loves me of course.
     
  11. Wildside

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    Well, at least when you do find Mr. Right and introduce him to everyone, they won't be able to say that you hadn't told them!!! I would love to see the looks on their faces when you say, "but I told you I was looking for a man," as they recall all their homophobic jabs. :roflmao::tears: (I don't know whether to laugh or cry. I guess, I start laughing, and then it hits me what happened here, and I break into tears)
     
  12. rainbowdesi

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    I came out to my co-workers and they have been amazing about it. It's been a true weight lifted off my shoulders to find acceptance and support. I live far away from my family so, the team has been kind of my second family. I consider myself lucky for having found them :slight_smile:
     
  13. love dont judge

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    Well, at the present time, my professional life is school, and im o'ut there. In fact, im finding that im telling more and more people in school everyday
     
  14. VideoGameLover

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    I work in retail. While I'm not "out" per se at work (Because I fear my dad SOMEHOW finding out), I think I made it pretty obvious with my femmy and flambouyant nature. Although those are just stereotypes, they still point people to who I really am somehow...

    There are plenty of LGBT type people at my workplace, my boss being one of them. She's super awesome. I can't see why anyone wouldn't be accepting. Maybe sometime I'll lay out the facts.

    My work is super chatty though. Nothing stays a secret there, and word spreads like wildfire. Maybe it's trauma, especially since no one in my work associates with my dad. Or perhaps maybe I'm a bit paranoid in that department. But either way, for now, they can't know. But I respect them so much that one day I want them to know.
     
    #14 VideoGameLover, Dec 8, 2014
    Last edited: Dec 8, 2014
  15. Calix

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    Out as trans to all and bi to whoever asks.
     
  16. Radioactive Bi

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    Yes, I'm out in my department at work, but not sure how many know. People found out when I came into work one day quite depressed and stressed as the night before I had been on the end of a barrage of biphobic remarks and insults from someone I thought I trusted.

    When, I was quizzed about why I was do down, I finally spilled the beans to a couple of people. It then became apparent that word had spread around my department as others asked me about my orientation. To be fair though, everyone has been very good and accepting and no one is really bothered by it. It should be noted that there are already a couple of gay guys where I work so it wadnt really a big deal.

    I work in an x-Ray department of a hospital by the way, as a radiographer.

    Happy days :slight_smile:
     
  17. Melanie

    Melanie Guest

    Yes and no. I have a few current and some former coworkers following me on instagram... Ive made posts where they should have definitely gleaned that information (and probably have). I suspect the rumor mill at work is going, so in that sense I suspect I am out to at least a few. :slight_smile: I'm pretty sure no one will ask me about it. I'm not that close to anyone at work.

    I have an analyst-type position which is essentially a worker bee sort of job. I doubt that it will affect my "career" much if I am out. Ive said in the past that my workplace is fairly diverse, which is a good thing.
     
  18. TraceElement

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    I'm a direct support professional in a group home. My current boss, supervisor and coworkers all know an are fine with it. At the home I worked at before, everyone knew and was fine with it. I haven't come out to higher up bosses because I rarely see them, but they would be cool with it.
     
  19. Wildside

    Wildside Guest

    I guess a part of it is whether we are working in the right place. I work in a catholic church. I don't think that my co-workers would be all that supportive. maybe I need to find a new line of work. :help::tears:
     
  20. FightingShadows

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    I think everyone just knew. Once I told people I'd prefer to be called Alex, it wasn't such a far jump to figure out why. Some I didn't even have to ask to be called by male pronouns, they just came along with my name.