Alright, for the past year or so I had been working on just getting over the fact that I am gay and I'm pretty sure I've accepted it. Now, I am not a patient person at all, so I drove myself batshit insane to get to where I am right now, and when I did get here, I was happy. All was good. And then, I felt the urge to tell people. And I was totally going to tell my friends until I remembered that my two better friends (Liz and Renee for those of you that may have read over my old thread) are almost always constantly around me. Normally this wouldn't be a problem. But they interact with both my mom and my dad and my little sister on a daily basis. If I did tell Liz and Renee, I'm sure it would just create an air of awkwardness whenever they talked to or were near my parents, because I would feel awkward and would be constantly worried about them slipping up. And then I thought, "Well, then, I wouldn't want to tell them." But I do want to tell them! But I also don't. It makes no sense whatsoever, and I'm physically suffering repercussions from all this back and forth in my head -- I'm getting headaches and I don't sleep well. It's just...grr this sucks! :S - TC
Hi there! I think it's great that you are at a stage where you feel that you have accepted yourself for who you are. It is good that you are happy. That's important. In terms of coming out to your friends, even though your friends know and interact with your parents and with your little sister, it does not mean that they will out you to your parents. It sounds like that you could trust your friends. If feel that you need to come out to them, you could tell them that you are ready for them to know, but not for your parents. I think most friends would accept that and would respect that wish. From my own experience (before I came out to my sister), I know that it can be hard because this is the first thought that comes to our minds, and we hope that there is not going to be a slip up. But ask yourself, why would your friends bring that up? Why would they out you? However, having these fears could also be an indication that you might not be ready yet for someone else to know. We can get at times different and contradictory feelings. One side of us wants to be the new us but the other side still holds us back because it wants to protect us. Try not to dwell too much on it. If you feel that the right time has come, maybe talk to one of your friends first and see how that goes. Once you feel more comfortable, then maybe come out to your other friend as well and take it from there. It is really up to you as to how you want proceed but remember that there is no rush incoming out to others. Go according to your own pace and with whatever you feel comfortable. I hope this helps a bit!
