So, I am 16 years old and ready to come out to my parents. I started questioning myself probably at 13 but only really came to grips with it this year. I told my first friend probably 6 months ago. Over several months, I amassed a solid support base of about a dozen or so friends and even my 13 year old brother. And I also have a boyfriend who is not out and my parents think we are just friends. Now, I want to tell my parents. That is my resolution for 2015, to make sure they accept me. I'm not worried about what will happen because I think it will all be fine in the end, but now I just want to know how I should be coming out. I wrote what I think is a very well though out coming out letter. I just don't know how or when to give it to them. I don't think I want to be there when they read it, so I was thinking maybe go to a friends house? But then again, I don't want to be waiting for a friend to give me the ok to come over, so I was maybe thinking put it on their bed before they go to sleep? Put it in their briefcase, as they both work long days? Send I by email? What should I do? I know I'll have to talk with them about it eventually, and I will, but writing is my forte and they know that, therefore that is how I wanted to come out. Any info is much appreciated.
Well if youre good at writing, the letter i believe could be a great idea. So youre off to a good start. Coming Out can take a bit of preparation. Physically and especially Mentally. As scary as it is though, it is probably a good idea to be there when they read it. or at least around. because they will probably want to talk and sometimes its best to not delay these things.. idk if you celebrate Christmas cuz not everyone does, but if you do, i was going to say you could even go as far as putting it in a stocking or even putting it under the tree with their name on it. Theres really so many ways to go about it. You need to do what feels the most comfortable. Dont put yourself in a situation you arent prepared to handle. wait until after the holidays if you think thats best. i didnt come out until i was 22. of course by that point, nobody i told was surprised. My parents figured it out on their own and just waited for me to say something before they told they had it figured out already -_- Like i said though, you just need to do what feels the most comfortable for you. even if you need to spend some time to think about it. thats really the best advice i can give. not sure if it helps, but i tried
Thanks! Great advice! I don't know if I'll want to be there or not though. And no, I do not celebrate Christmas, but I will definitely give it to them at a calmer time.
I'm in the same spot as you. I've written and rewritten my letter a hundred times and have thought through how to "deliver" it a multitude of times, only to conclude that the manner in which I deliver it probably won't matter, it just takes a lot of guts to do and I'm attempting to delay the inevitable by hyper-thinking it, ha. I've resolved to leave it on my mom's desk for her to read it alone whenever she has a chance, but I'll definitely be in the house for her to come talk to me afterwards if she feels inclined. Out of your options, I wouldn't put it in their briefcase, as it might be hard to give the appropriate attention and time to your letter when they are tied up at work. Leaving it on their bed might be good, but you should evaluate how tired they typically are when they head that way, so as to not jump this on them when they are already exhausted. Email doesn't feel as personal, but I suppose that's an option. Also, I wouldn't necessarily go running to a friend's house, it'd probably be best to be there if they want to talk. But, I mean, in the end though, they're your parents, do what feels right. Good luck! I wish you the best.
