Being home for the holidays is the first time that I have really felt "in the closet". My dad asked two days into coming home if I had anything going on romantically. I mentioned the date I had with a guy back at the beginning of the semester, and, even after he pushed farther, I didn't mention the date(s) I had with two women while I was away too, especially the one I had a few days to the end of the semester. I feel on edge and unhappy all the time, and I am finding it really hard to enjoy the holidays. I was sitting with my family tonight, opening presents, and all I could think about was the intense amount of anxiety that I seem to have with me 24/7. :tears: I don't know what to do. I can't tell anyone until I know for sure. I don't want to come out and then perhaps realize I'm straight or something!! :icon_redf I am freaking out ALL THE TIME. Help.
I can tell you at least this: If you come out and "realize" you're straight, then it just means you experimented, and a majority of people in this world, including a ton of straight people, at the very least experiments with their sexuality to learn who they're into. That being said, don't feel pressured to go into coming out right away if you're not absolutely sure of your feelings. I have a ton of anxiety these days too, and it gets really hard to keep from speaking up and blurting out exactly what's on my mind. That's why I use these forums as an outlet; I'd also suggest making a journal of some sort if you haven't already so you can explore your feelings with yourself, honestly, at your own pace. It worked wonders for me.