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Alone

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by Bluerose11435, Dec 26, 2014.

  1. Bluerose11435

    Regular Member

    Joined:
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    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Lesbian
    I dont want to sound rude but I could care less if you read this nobody cares about me anyways. I just need to get some things off of my chest. First of all it's not easy coming out I tried and my parents made my life a living hell. They said its a choice and not how you are born, I wish it was that easy I cut myself everyday wishing I could just be normal. I feel suffocated because I can't be who I am. I have had to go out with guys and pretend to like it because if I don't things will get worse at home. So I have to put up with guys kissing and trying to do things to me. I feel so numb and broken all the time I don't know what to do and I don't know how much longer I can take it.
     
  2. Wildside

    Wildside Guest

    This is a place where everyone does care about you. We all have our struggles, and we come here to support each other, Bluerose. And I'm really happy that you have come to Bluerose.
    As far as going out with the boys, why do you have to pretend that you like it? or even go out with boys? I hope you can just set limits. If your parents don't believe you, you are still the custodian of your own body and they can't force you to kiss boys or let them do things to you. That is just wrong.
    Do you have a counselor or therapist that you can talk to? I'm really worried about what you said about cutting. You know, that is such addictive behavior, and the relief that it seems to provide doesn't last.
    This is a place where you can vent what you need to vent, and where people will come onto your thread and share their experiences and sometimes even make some suggestions worth considering. But what I find has helped me the most here is just having a place to get my stuff out there, and knowing that there are people who are listening, and care about me even if they are thousands of miles away. :welcome: (&&&)
     
  3. ReadyToTell

    ReadyToTell Guest

    Listen, it will get better. Always look toward the future, you never know what's in store.
    Secondly, no it is not easy coming out. This is something people need to start understanding. No, your parents may not get it at first, but they will come around. After all, they did give you birth and will most likely only want to see you happy.
    I also advise not to have boyfriends. Don't force your self to have boyfriends. That is not only unhealthy for your self but you are giving into the pressures of society. You are just confirming that being gay is a choice by seeming all straight. You can act "straight" and still be single without forcing your self to have a boyfriend.
    Just remember, there are people out there in the same situation. Good luck.
     
  4. arken1

    Full Member

    Joined:
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    Messages:
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    Location:
    WA, USA
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Some people
    This may sound a bit blunt, but you do not HAVE to date guys and be uncomfortable. You may have to be abstinent, but you shouldn't allow your parents to force you to date. If I were in your situation, I would probably just focus on school and plans for after I turned 18 to get the heck out of there.

    Also, stop hating yourself over nothing. I have been a long time in the closet, but I don't see my statements as hypocritical, because I have NEVER hated myself. I saw myself as broken and tried to work on a fix while pursuing life. I have finally realized that while gay isn't the "norm", it is a completely livable life. If anyone I come out to can't cope with that even after going through the "stages of coming out to family", then I will just remove those people from my life. Your life is your life, no one else's. Focus on the end goal, not your current situation.
     
    #4 arken1, Dec 26, 2014
    Last edited: Dec 26, 2014