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Should I keep waiting?

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by whww123, Jan 10, 2015.

  1. whww123

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    I've come to terms that no matter how I come out to my parents, it's going to be an explosive argument. I may or may not get kicked out of my house. My parents are both strictly religious and homophobic. So should I just wait until I move out to tell them or should I nut up and tell them? It's killing me and every day is a struggle. Would the aftermath be too much or should I suffer a couple more years? Help.:icon_sad:
     
  2. KingJude

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    It depends. Will the pain of waiting until you can move out be more or less than the pain you'll feel if you tell them now and reject you? It's such a hard situation to be in. Why do you feel the need to tell them? Is it so you can start looking for a relationship, or is it because you just want to get it off your chest? Because if it's just to get it off your chest, why not seek a counsellor or therapist? They won't reject you, and they'll be able to give you advice about whether or not to come out, and if you decide that you want to come out, then they can help you through it. I hope you're okay. You're in a very tricky situation. (*hug*)
     
  3. whww123

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    Yeah I'd like to start looking for a relationship, which for me right now is impossible because I wouldn't be able to without being honest about my orientation with my friends and family. I also need to get it off my chest I'm 24, almost 25, and I'm still in the closet. I was thinking of seeing a therapist. And thanks for the response and love!
     
  4. KingJude

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    Well, that does make it tricky. I know what you mean about wanting to be honest, but is it worth being honest about your orientation to someone who won't accept it? If you think any members of your family or friendship group would be accepting of you, and would keep it a secret, then I'd start with them. There are many people who don't come out into well after they are 50. Yes, 25 is relatively late, but you haven't missed out on anything! I have a counsellor who I see regularly, and we discuss all of my issues, and it really helps me work out what I ought to do. I think you could do with that guidance. Everyone needs love (*hug*)
     
  5. happyhamster144

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    It is never too late I only came out to myself late last year. But I totally get the need to but honest. I was telling work friend that I had split up with my husband, she said you can get a toy boy then,I just though no thanks but was bursting to tell her the truth. But it would have been so the wrong thing to do to tell her. You have to make that judgement for yourself.
    Which of the two results is harder to live with, the rejection or the secret.
     
  6. TacobellKFC

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    Wait until you can move out and support your self if you know they will kick you out....cause my dumbass tried somthing like that and I had to sleep outside in my friends shed for four months and I was working at the time....the issue was not about coming out it was different but I was sure they would kick me out and they did..so unless you have a place to go or actual friends that will help you dont do it... its cold and hard out there man..
     
  7. whww123

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    In a loose response to all the replies, I do have supportive friends and I know I wouldn't be homeless in the case I did get kicked out. Maybe I should just do it. I think I'm gonna come out to one of my best friends and re-come out to another (I told him I was bi when I was drunk one time but we never talked about it again). This should be fun. :confused: Once I have the support to fall back on, I feel like my parents/family won't be so bad. :eusa_doh:
     
  8. catsarecute

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    Well I Would Never Ever Tell My Parents Unless I was gonna get married to man. It's not worth your parents constantly against you my parents are the same way and they acted phyco when i said my friend was bi and it's just not worth it :frowning2:
     
  9. whww123

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    That's the thing: I'm romantically attracted to men and not women. I'm like loosely bisexual. Like I find some woman sexy and I have had sex with a woman before, but it's not nearly close to the drive I have for other men or the sexual tension or attraction I feel towards them. So, yes, I eventually want to marry a man and lucky for me, my state has same-sex marriages :icon_bigg