Should I hide it from my roommate?

Do you have an idea where she stands concerning lgbt subjects ?

Have you dropped hints, like what your favourite actresses are ?
Or a conversation about favourite tv series ?

One possibility would be to say you're gay, but you value friendship very much... something along those lines...


(*hug*)

 

You "should" do what you feel most comfortable doing.

Are you afraid she'll react strongly and negatively, are you afraid she'll just be uncomfortable around you, or do you just not want one of the first things she learns about you to be "I'm gay"?

College (some colleges, at least) is probably one of the best places to be out. As your roommate, if you're out to other people on campus or even most people, it's possible she will find out anyway. If she was going to react negatively, she will; if she wouldn't care if you told her, she won't care then. If she knows you're involved in queer activism and hasn't made any negative comments, chances are she'll be fine with it.

I don't feel you're obligated to announce your sexuality to her, but maybe deliberately hiding it isn't such a great idea. Being lied to may make her more uncomfortable and angrier than discovering you're attracted to women. Also, if she asks directly, you'll probably be able to tell by facial cues or her tone of voice whether it's a big deal to her or not, or just curiosity, and maybe then you'll know how to proceed.

Or maybe you should just wait until you know her better. I didn't come out to my first after high school roommate until we weren't roommates anymore, but I never hid it from her, either; it just didn't come up, since I was dating a guy at the time. I haven't come out to my current roommate, though I have hinted at it pretty strongly, and will probably make it clear to her soon.