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Scared to come out

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by 83protons, Jan 27, 2015.

  1. 83protons

    Regular Member

    Joined:
    Jan 27, 2015
    Messages:
    2
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    0
    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Female
    Sexual Orientation:
    Bisexual
    Out Status:
    A few people
    I'm a bisexual woman (happily married to a man who knows). I want to come out as bi but am worried about how some of my female friends will react. I'm worried that they will think I fancy them. Or that they'll misconstrue an innocent hug as something more. I don't want to lose my close female friends, but I also want them to know me more fully
    What should I do?
     
  2. PatrickUK

    Advisor Full Member

    Joined:
    Feb 25, 2014
    Messages:
    6,943
    Likes Received:
    2,359
    Location:
    England
    Gender:
    Male
    Gender Pronoun:
    He
    Sexual Orientation:
    Gay
    Out Status:
    Out to everyone
    The feelings you describe are not unusual amongst LGBT people. Before coming out many of us ponder over the same questions and we often convince ourselves that it will damage friendships and relationships, when so often, it does not.

    What kind of people are your friends? Do you consider them reasonable, tolerant and understanding? If so, you should have no problems with them. Have they ever said anything that would give you reason to believe they'd be upset or awkward towards you?

    Bear in mind that you can come out in a number of ways. You may prefer to tell them face to face, but don't rule out the possibility of sending a well considered letter or e-mail. If you sit down and really put your mind to it a letter or e-mail can be very personal and from the heart and you can cover a lot of important points about your sexuality and feelings. You could even put your letter inside a friendship greeting card.