Ok...I'm young...I guess its safe to say Im 14 and I am absolutley 100% positive that I am gay. There is no second thoughts, girls to me are *blah* (no offense to the girls who read this), but guys are different. Anyway...I go to a Catholic High School...but it's not homophobic, there are a couple out people. THey seem accepting, except some of the freshman guys in my class, whenever we change for gym they call each other "fags" "c**ksuckers* and other pretty little names. I told a few girls and they promised to keep my secret but I want to tell my friends some of which are the guys in my gym class but I'm afraid of what they'd say
I think it is good that there are already a couple of people that are out. I would definitely try to connect up with them at some point (if you haven't done so already) as it could help you to buildup your support network. Often people call each other names, just to fit in or to be seen to be cool. That said, I think the first question you have to ask yourself is as to whether you trust your friends enough to confide in them. If doubts arise, sometimes, it is better to wait and not to rush into things. If you are unsure or afraid of what they might say, maybe hold off for a little bit. If you do decide to come out to them, talk to them individually, and start with the friend who you trust the most. But again, take your time. Hope this helps!
I guess that'll depend. You told these girls, and they promised to keep it dark. You seem concerned about telling these guys. Presumably, at that point, it won't matter if they keep it a secret, since the main potential homophobes appear to be these guys you're planning on telling anyway. Should you tell your friends? I think so. Or at least clue them in. Next time you hear them calling each other "fag", call them out on it. "Hey, I know gay guys, and it's lame to hear you guys saying stuff like that." Their response to that might give you some idea how they'd respond to you coming out. Lex
Vampireboy, I think both Lexington and Astroid have given you sound advise. I believe that Astroid hit the nail on the head when he said that you should try to connect with the guys that you know are out. I also agree that you should take your time when coming out. I'm 29, and I still haven't told everybody. Some people need to know, and some people don't. Just make sure that whoever you tell is not somebody that will run their mouth. Start with your most trusted friend first. I also agree with Lexington's point about correcting the guys when they call each other homophobic names. You can let them know that you have some gay friends and that you would appreciate them not using homophobic remarks in your presence. Like Lex said, their reaction will give you an idea of how they would react if you told them. It might also act as an indirect way of giving them an idea about you without you having to tell them right now. Whatever you choose, my friend, I urge you to just be careful. I know how badly you want to tell people about your life and how badly you want people to accept you the way you are; I'm the exact same way. However, although it gets better with every generation, we still live in a homophobic society. I'm a police officer, and I'm going through a very similar situation. I have to rely on my fellow officers to have my back at work, but I'm not sure how they would act or if they would have my back when the s*** hit the fan if they knew I was gay. That is why I take it one day at a time and tell people only when I know the time is right.
