how young is too young?

Factoring in what your parents think will probabily keep them happy, if it matters to you. Personally, I think that I would be more comfortable with my sibbling growing up knowing who I actually am. (Then again, I have a sister who I haven't told, but I am not entirely out either.) Maybe you could try talking to your parents about why it is important to you that your brother knows?

 

I agree with TeeBe, tell your parents how you're feeling on the topic and see if you can reach an agreement

 

I think for your parents it might not be about, your brother knowing who you are but maybe about the sex issue and they dont wanna have that discussion at 8 years old, i'm sure

 

i think my 13yo brother nos that i am but i dont want to tell him yet and my other brother is only 10 and that might be a bit young??? probably 14yo or even 15yo???

 

That's not fair to either of you. Or, ANY of you. You and your gf should be able to be yourselves and have an adult relationship, not hide. And you brother deserves to be treated his age. How can he be expected to be honest (like all perents want...I am assuming that yours are the same) if people aren't honest with him?

 

This is a question I've thought a bit about too recently. I'm not out either, but I do have two young daughters who I expect, at some point in time, will need to know the truth.

The one comment that was made to me that struck me was that I shouldn't wait too long, because the older they get the more exposed they will have been to some of the negative comments and stereotypes about gays... and to find out later that their dad is gay may cause them to question how they feel about their dad. Scary stuff though.

 

My bro is 12 and doesn't know. I'm thinking I'll wait until he's 14 or 15 so he's mature enough to handle it and will know it may not be something everyone agree on. I also want him to be able to make his own opinion.

 

I know a 4 year old who knows what gay is. She has a gay uncle with a partner and a son. (I told this story in a thread, if anyone remembers.) They explain it in a simple way to her- Uncle loves Uncle's partner like mommy and daddy do. and that it's normal.
*shrug* I don't know. It depends on the kid I guess.

 

I'm thinking of the 8 year olds I've had in my daycare and I think they would understand. I do however think you should talk with your parents some more and tell them exactly what you plan on saying to him. They may feel more comfortable knowing the details. I have a really good brochure from the National Mental Health Association. It is entitled: What Does Gay Mean? It has age-appropriate responses. It is attached here.

 

i have 2 younger sisters, one's 14 and the other's 9. the 9 year old doesn't know, and i dont' think she needs to. at least not yet. the other one knows and, to my surprise, is totally ok w/ it and hasn't really, um, affected anything.

 

My sister's 11 and assuming I would ever come out I wouldn't tell her because she's the town crier....she'll let everyone she comes in contact with know and that would be terrible on a gargantuan scale.

 

you should talk to your parents about how you feel about it and come to sort of agreement on this

 

I have now enabled PDF attachments and attached the document to Becky's post #11 above.

 

When I was 8 years old, I knew perfectly what being homosexual meant, although I only knew the words "homosexual" and "fag" (I didn't know the words gay and lesbian). I didn't have anything against it, although I was totally straight (or better, asexual) then. My parents had simplified it as "a man who likes men" or "a woman who likes women". That was -then- not my case but I was cool with it.

 

BeckyG - thanks for the link to that document. I've saved a copy to read later. I'm sure it will come in handy.

 

You are welcome!