Hi, I don't really want to come out to my parents (as bi) soon but I kind of have to. My younger is starting at my school next year and I am out at school and I can not trust her to keep my secret. So what should I do? I know my parents are not super homophobic but they will be disappointed most likely, perhaps ashamed. They also won't let me have sleepovers or hang out unsupervised with my (platonic) female friends anymore, probably. I am also worried they won't believe me.
Hi SquidwardT, This is a very hard problem to give advice for. My only solution is to carry on as you are, I am not saying suppress it. You have to remember, you are only sixteen and you've got your life ahead of you. So, I know that you are scared about being forced to 'come out' I think the best thing to say, you can take or leave this advice is to say to your parents "I realise I am 16 and I want to wait until I am established and settled in whatever choice I make, for now I am concentrating on what is important, so I can succeed in life." I hope this helps?
Thanks for the advice, but even if I say that, won't I need to somewhat come out to them? I don't really want to leave this as an opened ended issue either, especially cause they have said that I am too young to even have crushes, yet if have known I am bi since I was 12. I just think maybe I should tell them so I don't have to worry about my sister telling them. I don't want to talk about my sexual attraction with my parents or give them room to "advise" me as to what it is.
You might think about what you want to say since you know them best... you might have a look here: http://emptyclosets.com/forum/comin...so-frustrating-not-being-able-come-out.html#2 hugs
Okay I agree with that, it's better from you than from anybody else. But as I have learnt from talking to my parents about anything is they want to know if you'll be established and settled, which I'm sure you know already. But, if you let them know about that, it will hopefully take some of the tension away from not only yourself, but also your parents being concerned in their own parental way and IF! they say, I'm not saying it will happen, but IF! they say it's a phase or whatever, the worse thing to do is to try and prove it at sixteen. If they accept you as bisexual that's great. If you feel you are forced to come out, first off, don't feel scared that something horrific will happen, because there is always support wherever you are, you'll feel naturally nervous but if the worse does happen, you know where to go. But that is a VERY! high chance of that happening, if your parents understand they will say something like "It's your business and it's none of ours or your sister's to know." Because it's your life, once that you are on the road either in college or in life, you will have a life of your own where people will understand and support you and will not care if your bi, gay...alien. You know, it's good that you have this mature understanding at sixteen, when I was sixteen, I didn't. I'm sure it will work out for the best, I hope this helps?
