I'm 14 and ready to come out as lesbian to a few close friends. Is there anyway for me to bring it up and not have it be out of the blue? How do I tell them? Are things going to be completely different after they know? I just get really anxious when I even think about telling them even though I knoe they're going to accept me (they aren't homophobic or anything). I could really just use some advice and tips on coming out. And do you think 14 is young and maybe I should wait a few more years? Does the anxiety mean I'm not ready yet?
First of all I don't think that 14 is too young to come out. I didn't start coming out until I was 23 and I often regret that I didn't come out when I was younger. If you can be out at 14 then more power to you. You'd be a braver individual than I. I remember when I first came out to a close friend of mine several years ago. I was really scared and nervous, so I think it's perfectly normal to be anxious the first time you come out to someone. For me, I'd kept it in for so long that just the act of coming out was a scary thing. In the end I really had nothing to worry about from my friend. She simply smiled at me and said "Hon, it's okay." She was totally cool with it and turned out to be bi herself anyway. I think that sometimes our minds make things worse than they really turn out to be. Personally, I'm more comfortable coming out to friends and family one at a time. I usually wait for a time when I know we'll both be alone for a while to tell them. I'll tell them that I have something important to talk to them about, that way I have their full attention. Then I ask them how they feel about gay people as a lead in to coming out to them. If you know that your friends aren't homophobic and that they'll accept you, then you have nothing to worry about. I think that the anxiety you're feeling is the fear that maybe they'll treat you differently. And they might or might not, depending on how comfortable they are about sexuality. If someone has a problem with your sexuality it's more likely that they are insecure about themselves and that has nothing to do with you. It's their problem that's causing their discomfort. This is from my personal experience and I hope this helps!
