so recently I turned 18 and I've been to straight clubs before with my friends and i feel completely left out, my friends are off having fun with boys and I'm just kind of babysitting everyone :dry: I would really like to go to a gay club and just have fun with some boys for once lol!(*hug*) I am a pretty shy person but i'm not afraid to socialize and when I become comfortable with people I can get pretty crazy (!) so any thoughts on going to gay clubs alone? have any of you done it?
Have gone alone. Wasn't the most exciting experience, but I got to dance and be around 'our kind of people', which is what I was looking for. Two big factors will be what kind of club it is and your reaction to it. There are all different types of gay bars/clubs from huge dance clubs to dive bars with pool tables and dart boards and some may be more to your taste than others. A lot can also depend on when you go and if any events are going on that night. So, don't be afraid to shop around and also give a place more than one chance. As far as your reaction, watch your drink and realize that it's not a given that people will talk to you just because you are there. So you may have to strike up a conversation or talk to the bar tender or otherwise be proactively sociable, just as with any other type of club/bar. Note that just because someone talks to you, it doesn't automatically mean they want to have sex with you. On the flip side, you need to realize and accept that sex plays a role here. You are almost certainly going to see same sex couples engaging in PDA to various (sometimes intense) degrees. Possibly beyond what you would see straight people doing in a straight bar. You may have various people of various ages and appearances flirt with you or flat out hit on you. If your reaction is shock and horror then you are not likely to have a good time. This doesn't mean you need to accept their advances if you don't want to go that far, but figure out a way to turn them down politely and pleasantly and don't make a big deal of it. If you are open to the possibility of hooking up then bring your own condoms (because you are only ever going to practice safe sex of course) and be honest about your experience level and what your boundaries are. Don't let yourself be pressured into doing something you don't want to do. Have fun, Todd
no idea what I was going into and wow that really opened my eyes a lot! thank you so much for your response!
Many years ago, when I was not out at all and being gay was illegal, I would go to straight clubs with my friends and sneak of to gay clubs alone. When I was in straight clubs I was super tense and socially clumsy. The first time I went to a gay club it felt so right, I was at home and I could relax and have fun! The gay club that I went to was the only one in the country and was in a grotty semi derelict building. Not the kind of place I would normally go to, but it was great. Gay clubs now have gone upmarket. The advice of AKTodd is good now go, have fun.
You will eventually go there, that´s for sure and since you´ve already thought about it, just go and have fun. But you should know your limits before hand since you are so young and not so experienced. Things like, - what do I drink and how much can I stand, do I get sick easily - do I take drugs - Am I willing to have casual sex and one night stands - what kind of sex I like and dislike - am I a top or a bottom - do I use condom - do I talk to strangers and can I do small talk - do I get into a fight easily Gay nightlife is a very exciting thing for a new beginner. If you wanna go alone, those kinds of things are good to remember, so that the day after feeling won´t hit you too hard. And let me tell you, that it will hit you depending on your personal morality standards. If you are afraid, why don´t you ask your straight friends to come along with you to a gay club for a change. It would be their turn to babysit for you for a change! I have done it myself many times, but I´m an average gay man, not too pretty to be hit by some "pervert". Yes, and remember that, there are also those "hardcore" guys out there looking for a hunt, so be careful.....but you´ll have fun I´m sure of that :eusa_danc
and remember, your first visit to a gay club can be just a social experience, just like people who goes to straight bars. if you make any gay friends, it's nice to go with someone else, but I guess that's not an option for you yet. but if you have any cool straight friend, you could ask him to go as your wing man. just like you haven't been shy about going with him to his straight club, he could go with you and maybe have some fun. unless he's afraid that he won't be able to resist some cute guys advances! LOL! :lol:
