Hi guys! Just wanted to say that I had my first sort-of-coming-out experience yesterday! I decided finally that I wanted to try seeing a therapist. I have been thinking about it for a while now since I have not told anyone (except EC folks) that I am questioning my orientation and I have been thinking that talking about things might help me to feel less anxious and maybe help me figure things out, but I just could not bring myself to make the phone call. However, finally I decided to just do it, so I called to make a first appointment and of course she asked me what issues I wanted to deal with and so for the first time out loud I said to another person the words "I am questioning my sexual orientation!" Yay! (!) I know that this does not really count for much because I was saying it to a total stranger and I only said I was questioning which is I guess not the same as coming out definitely as lesbian or bisexual or pan or whatever I turn out to be, but it was a start! It was really scary to pick up the phone but once the words were out of my mouth I was really happy. For like one minute. And then I started feeling scared again after I hung up, haha, but I think that is fairly normal when confronting a life transition of this sort...and just thinking about talking to another person about the whole thing definitely makes it feel so much more real. Anyway my appointment is next Friday, so wish me luck! :icon_bigg It's weird because sometimes I find myself really looking forward to the appointment, and other times my doubting self starts saying that the very idea I might be anything other than straight is crazy and stupid and absurd and I shouldn't go. It's funny how the mind works when it thinks it needs to get frightened about something, isn't it? :eusa_doh: Any of you seen a therapist? If so, did you find it helpful? (sorry, I guess that is really a too personal question to be asking! but I will leave it here in case anyone wants to answer.) I am not sure what I am hoping to get out of it, really, in view of the fact that I know I am the only one that can know what my orientation is, and I do not want to be influenced by someone else. On the other hand, I think it might be nice to talk to someone face-to-face about it without worrying about whether or not they will be supportive/whether I can trust them to keep it a secret, etc. Everyone in my family has a tendency to keep their problems bottled up, so I am trying to break the tradition!
Well, I think that totally counts for something. I've so far told the dog and the mirror so a real live person is great! I haven't had therapy but I bet you'll get a lot out of it. Especially since you were already able to open up to one complete stranger. Being able to say the words out loud is huge, in my mind. Congrats!
this defenitely count's as a start, now you've made the first step i wish you much luck friday, Go girl!!
I disagree: it is not a small step! Saying something like that out loud takes courage, and going to see someone to help you deal with your emotion is a great leap forward. Praise yourself for taking that step into the unknown and not pretending "it" will go away. "Brushing diamante under the carpet will not stop it exploding" You have your therapist and us on EC to help and support you on your journey. (&&&) PS I did see a therapist but that was to "get me to like girls" that was a disaster! My wife did see a number of therapists to help her with childhood sex abuse and she found them great. Most therapists are really great, but it is a matter of finding the right one for you. If you feel you don't "gel" with this one you can always find a different therapist. Wishing you all the best.(*hug*)
That is definitely a big step! Congrats! I have also been looking into going to see a therapist myself but have not yet got the courage to do so! I hope everything works out !
Nah that is awesome!! Congrats Coming out is so nerve-wracking at first and even telling a therapist is a big step. I used to see a therapist but not specifically about my orientation, but concerning my depression and anxiety. However, she was one of the first people I told and I soon realized that staying in the closet was a big factor relating to my mental health. It's always nice to tell somebody you know will be non-judgmental and helpful
Congrats! (*hug*) A step is a step, doesn't matter how small it seems to you, to walk forward means progress. I felt the same like you. It seems like it's nothing when we say it to a stranger, but keep in mind this : It was huge for you to say it aloud to another human being. First steps are always the most difficult, so don't be too hard on yourself (*hug*) I remember not so long ago when I went to have my first counseling session. The social worker was very supportive, and asked me first about the pronouns, and even about my name... It was the first time I heard someone calling me by my real name, and it felt awesome... I was finally there, instead of having to play a role, you know? I wish you the best with the appointment. I'm not in therapy, but it's my next step in order to get HRT, and looking forward to it. Doesn't matter how big or small your steps are... They are all yours! (*hug*)
