I dont understand whats wrong

Aw! I think you're great even though I don't really know you.
I think we go through hardships so that when the good times roll around we appreciate them even more.

You are still young, you've got plenty of time to make memories.

Uh, oh yeah. Since you're a good person I would guess people might not like you because they're jealous.

I know it probably doesn't mean much but I would totally date you. : D

 

Well to be blunt - most people don't care about things like whether you drink or do drugs. Most people don't give a shit about your past - you were and what you did or didn't do yesterday isn't who you are today.


You say that people have never appreciated certain aspects of your person, but how many people have known you well enough to acknowledge them?

How open are you?

You have spent a lot of your life alone. Do you actually go out and look for people and things to do or are you introverted because of your past experiences?

 

I don't get it either. I think you're a pretty awesome person. I know we never talked before.. but I always thought you were like one of the coolest persons on EC, of the more reserved atleast.

People in general are stupid.. and though I believe there's good in everyone, I just don't really get why you have to be a drinker or you have to do something 'bad' for them to like you. Fitting in is extremely hard when you have no idea how.. and I don't know how myself so I guess I'm not helping.. but at the same time I'm not sure your asking how to fit in.. and actually I'm pretty sure you're not so nevermind x_x

But from what I have learned is that you can't just be special to yourself and think the world is going to find you. I don't drink or do drugs either. I'm doing pretty well in school and I'm not unnatractive or extremely weird and random. I was actually an undiscovered gifted student for a few years.. until they discovered me XD but what I mean is that you have to grab people's throats and tell them you're special before they realize it. No one's looking for people, they just run into them. I've missed out on a lot of childhood things too.. atleast what I consider to be special and meaningful. It wasn't until a year ago that I realized you have to force people to look at you to get noticed. Sometimes people get lucky and that's not the case.. but that's really all I can say to you that might be of some help.

I really hope you find new experiences. Life isn't fun without them.
(*hug*)

 

It sounds to me like you have a strong head on your shoulders. I think that you should be excited that you are going to be in a film. That is a major achievement.

I can really relate to most of what you said. I am rather distanced from most of my family, outside of my mother, an aunt, and two uncles. I have two best friends, who are actually brothers. I have a small handful of friends that I keep in very close touch with from school... and that's really it. I spent most of my high school and college days alone. In high school, I worked Monday thru Friday after school to avoid getting picked on. I never wanted to admit this to anyone but myself, but I will admit it here. I was often picked on at and after school... apparently my mannerisms were stereotypically gay, and there was a small group of "tough guys" who at times would spit at me and call me names. They always asked me "so do you spit or swallow" and then another would spit on me and say "nah, he swallows." I was always so embarrassed that I never told my best friend or his brother. Instead, I worked many hours. My Friday night in high school was typically working until 9pm and then coming home and going to bed. In college, I would talk to a few people on messenger, go out occasionally for dinner or a movie, but the rest of the time I was often alone. I would spend whole days at the mall trying on clothes. But, it was me and I always loved myself, even though I was sad.

On top of this, I only came out this past summer, when I was 23. I missed out on the chance of finding a boyfriend to love and be loved by in high school AND college. I did this because I did not want others to know of my sexuality. Good choice, it really got me far... NOT. Today, I've done pretty much a 180. I really stopped caring what other people think and just live my own life. I say all of this because I want you to do three things:

1) Do not make the same mistake I did - do not let the opinions or judgments of others stop you from finding what kind of lifestyle makes you the happiest.

2) Do not label yourself or try to do things that other "social" people are doing just to fit in. Find the mix that is right for you.

3) Appreciate yourself before you expect others to appreciate you. You were selected to be in a film. You obviously are a talented, likable person. You appear to have some very strong good characteristics. You must appreciate your self before you can expect to feel appreciated.

And don't change your life around to gain the appreciation of others. It will come in time. I tried to feel wanted and appreciated so I hid my sexuality for almost 10 years, and where did it get me - not any more or less appreciated or wanted by a group of people that I am no longer in contact with anyway.

I hope this helps. Spend some time to see what lifestyle mix makes you the happiest. Appreciate yourself, and then, once you become confident in yourself, you should be able to find someone compatible with your lifestyle.

Life is a short thing - enjoy it on your terms.

 

somethi gi have noticed has help me gain friends and lovers is confidence i have trained myself and this will sound conceited but it makes me feel GREAT to stop by any mirror i see and just for a second look at it and say "DAMN i look good today!" just try it and mean it i joke bout it with my friends now cuz it's to where EVERY time i see my reflection i do it as a habbit just don't let it get you self centered then it would have the opposite effect

 

Although it doesnt seem like it, some people do appreciate the whole "good boy" thing. It just depends on who youre looking at. People always will judge you but through their own moral values and such. Meaning that people who smoke, drink, etc arent going to appreciate the fact that you dont. But people who dont do those things will in fact appreciate it. They may not say it but they will judge you better for it.

And thats how you get freinds. Freinds are the people who have judged you and still like you. If they didnt like you they wouldnt be your freinds. Dont let people tell you who your freinds should and should not be. freindship is mutual so you shouldnt worry much about what people think about them (unless its really bad). freinds no matter how weird, cooky, wacky, depressing, macabre, strange, etc are still your freinds. they are the people who support you and love you for who you are.

About feeling "empty" like youve missed a lot in your life...do something about it. Talk to people at school (in college?), or work, neighbors, whatever; make MORE freinds, hang out with them, make some memories for yourself. The past is the past and youre never going to get any wasted time back. Look to the future and start making up for what was lost.

Dont worry so much. Although ive never met you, you seem like a really nice guy. Nice guys arent always so easy to find nowadays and everyone like the nice guy because theres nothing bad to dislike. You just need to start getting to know more people. Things will get better.

Besides, everyone here appreciates you (*hug*)

 

Hey Man you made me cry.
You will find somebody everyone does maybe someone here.

 

There's no such thing as a past you didn't have.

Can I ask if you have always felt like this?

Back when you were 13 and 14 were you feeling like you were living empty life?

 

The past is the past. If we could go back and change it,I bet almost everyone would.
You can't change what WAS,only what IS.
You sound like you're on the right track.
You have to play on your strengths. You act. That's a good thing.
If you enjoy something, make that one of your strengths.
I know you don't care to hear this,but you ARE only 19.
You have so much life to live and so much to give.
There are many people who don't even have as much as you have.
Sweetie,give it time and just enjoy what you have NOW.
Life does have a way of surprizing you. Bide your time...it WILL get better.