Hi all :smilewave Just a little background info...I'm 15, a sophomore in high school, and as of right now I'm only out to my best friends. I've always knew I liked girls and figured out I was gay in like second grade lol. I decided my 2015 new year's resolution was going to come out completely or at least to more people. The thing is I don't really know how. I don't really only open up about personal things until I REALLY trust someone, which is why I'm only out to four people. I want to be able to casually drop hints that clearly indicate I'm gay without me having to outright say it. This is a bit hard for me because I'm easily embarrassed/nervous even though I don't always show it and I'm also pretty femme so no one even has any suspicions about my sexuality which would make it a big shock to whoever I was telling (my best friend since 1st grade was completely surprised when I told her but very accepting). I really really hate that initial awkward period of time after coming out to someone so do you guys know any ways to eliminate it?? Thanks for taking the time to read this long post wow
i am still working on how to tell my best friend and i am fairly certain how things will turn out. i hope things work out for you good luck.
I don't think there is a way to eliminate it completely. There will always be moments that we can't avoid...that reality. Once you get through it, you won't have to experience it again.
I am in a similar boat and dropping hints has not really gotten me anywhere. I think that you should find the courage to just say "I'm gay" to a kid at school. I haven't yet. Just get the initial awkwardness over with, don't make it last months.
Maybe point out to some people when you see a pretty girl, like in the same kind of way that a straight girl would mention a hot guy? I don't know, I'm figuring out the same thing myself. But I hope this helps!
Does your school have a GSA? You could start going to that, which would give you some new social connections. Also, people tend to assume that people who go to GSA are gay (which is annoying, but can help). There's no real way to completely eliminate the awkwardness of coming out.
That little period of awkwardness is unavoidable, but for the most part, it's pretty short. Once the initial shock (or lack thereof) wears off, things pretty much go back to normal within a few minutes. I came out to a close friend who was rather homophobic at school, and then after school I sent him a text and asked him to keep everything we talked about private, and he just said "okay" like it was no big deal. The little bit of awkwardness at first is worth the feeling of having someone who knows your secrets and is always there for you when you need someone.
high school can be the toughest place of all for a lot of people for coming out. I definitely couldn't have done it in my homophobic all male high school. but things are different today, and maybe it wouldn't be so bad. I would suggest first just coming out to people who you know will not use the information to hurt you in any way. that will build up your confidence for coming out to others.
Hey guys, thanks for all the great responses! Hopefully I can put myself out there and just say it but I usually panic in the moment
I'm a freshman, and I would like to tell you that consigu out was the best thing that's happened for me. I was in a position like you're in right now, and here's what I did: Okay, so this is kind of interesting. Since I didn't really like to say it because I felt like it would be made into a bigger deal than it should have been, I iust stopped hiding myself. I showed who I geule am, and that sort of helped because I have some gay stereotypes. Of course, lots of people don't like being classified like this because stereotyping is wrong (that's how I feel too), but I felt like doing it would just help spark the conversation. Not many people actually know for sure that Im gay, but they have their suspicions, and most of them just assume because I'm so open about it. I've just never formally came out to a lot of people. This was the perfect decision for me because I don't like drawing attention. I don't know about you of course, but I can tell you that this is a great choice if you feel awkward just sitting down and telling people. In addition to this, I also include hints in conversations that I have that I am gay, but many people don't pick up on them. I would just suggest that if this seems right for you, go for it, because in the long run, you won't regret it.
congratulations, Zestylion, on a great way of dealing with the situation. high school can be a tough time of life, but it sounds like you're navigating it really well!
