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"Sister"

Discussion in 'Coming Out Advice' started by madscientistjf, Mar 30, 2015.

  1. madscientistjf

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    I put quotes around sister because I'm talking about my cousin, but we are really close and I've always thought of her as a sister. I really want to come out to her, but I'm really scared to. I don't know why I am though. Everyone at school knows (I'm not exaggerating either, EVERYONE ) and she heard someone say it because we go to school together and she almost got in a fight because of it. She said she didn't believe it but then said she would be fine if I was. Any tips on how I can make it easier for me. How I can make it less scary?
     
  2. Yossarian

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    Send her an email telling her you don't want her to get in fights for you for no reason, because what they are telling her about you is true. Then apologize for not telling her about it before telling the others, which you probably should have, but you were embarrassed about it and scared to tell her.

    Sometimes you just have to grit your teeth and do what you know is right, scary or not. The fear is all in your head, because she has already said she would be fine with it.
     
  3. JooBooGoo

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    You could always send her an email if you don't want to tell her in person. Or whenever you are in an LGBT related conversation, just slip it in subtly, but so much that she doesn't understand what you are talking about.
     
  4. Broods

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    If you truly do see your cousin as your sister, and are attending the same school, I think it might be really beneficial to the both of you to tell her in person. You said she told you she would be fine if you were gay, so it already sounds like she will be supportive. I am not going to lie, coming out in person to someone in your family is one of the hardest and scariest things. It can be difficult to find the words and the strength to do it. But you should know that after you tell her, you are going to feel much better about the whole thing.

    When I came out to my best friend in person (the first person I told) I actually practiced what I was going to say in the mirror - as cheesy as it sounds it helped. I knew there were certain things I wanted to say, and practicing allowed me to get used to those things, while working through my emotions. When I came out to my Mom, I started the conversation with "I have something important I need to tell you." By starting that way it almost prevented me from backing out, and I found the right words after that.
     
  5. penta

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    If you find it difficult you can also write a letter and read it to her in person