I feel ready to explode everytime my parents make a comment about others, once I was even told I'd be loved whoever I was unless I was bi ... Cue disappointment from me. My younger cousin is out and my parents make comments about him every now and then that make me want to scream but knowing how they feel makes me scared to come out. I've only recently started being honest with myself about my feelings towards people of both genders, but holding so much in being afraid of my parents knowing is cutting me up, and stopping me from perusing my feelings towards someone because I don't want to disappoint anyone "/ :bang:
That's really sad. I can empathize with you on this, to be honest. But if we look at the bright side, they can be really accepting of you, even if it takes time. Sometimes, parents say one thing, but they can totally soften once it comes to their child. But you know, you don't have to come out now. Hold it in a little longer, you're not ready yet. I think it's best to come out when you're fully confident that you can stand on your own if they seem appalled by your coming out. It's really hard to be closeted. But I guess time will come and we never have to hide who we truly are anymore. Best of luck!
I do worry a lot about what they'll say. I know they'll be happy for me as long as I'm happy, but the comments feel like little digs. I can see what you're saying though! Maybe I'll just wait a little until I feel more comfortable with them knowing before I tell them. Thanks for the advice!!
What you are experiencing is not uncommon. I distinctly remember hearing my parents and relatives use derogatory terms about LGBT people before I came out to them and if I'm being honest, it made it all the harder to come out. But when they realised that it was me (the very same person they had always known) all of the negativity passed. I can't say they were ecstatic about it, but I wasn't seeking that sort of response from them anyway - all I asked for was acceptance, and for the most part, that's what I got. From what you are telling us, I think it might be the same for you. It might be easy for them to berate or belittle someone else, but attitudes soften when it's their own 'flesh and blood'. Take your time. There is no rush to come out. Could you maybe drop a few subtle hints in advance? Sometimes, doing this can feel like the start of the process and may lessen the strain that you are under right now. Keep talking to all of us. You can be yourself here.
Thanks for the advice... I have been dropping hints here and there, and I've even told a few more friends who have been really supportive and things are starting to look up. The happier I m the easier it'll be for me to say hey mum , hey dad. This is me
